Thank you for being a friend.

I am stress eating carbs like

My mother is 78 and has NEVER voted for a Democrat (much to my chagrin). This morning she was in line long before 7 a.m. (with quite a few others, she texted) in DALLAS TEXAS to vote for Hillary Clinton. Her reason? “While only a child the last time a fascist demagogue almost destroyed the world and ran his country…

And yet no one went to jail from General Mills...

I can’t early vote either and I’m signed up for 8 hours of volunteering this weekend/Monday! I’m worried I’m going to break the voting machine with how hard I am going to vote.

The “lol” at the end of this comment is what makes it star worthy!

Half, she was later inspired to convert to Christianity by Billy Graham (lol).

Jellybeans, too. One Easter, my then toddler kept bringing me white jellybeans, demanding I open my mouth, then popping them in. At first I thought she just didn’t like the white beans, but after about the 20th, I discovered she was sucking the colored sugar coatings off the beans, then feeding me their naked corpses.

because germs or because selfishness?

Coffee With Cream

No, just Pandora’s Mouth at this stage. The Box is phase II.

SEE

All fights worth fighting observe ceasefires for Xmas, game 7s and dead dogs.

Seriously. The Glee version was better. And now I have to go slap myself for ever uttering that sentence.

That version of Touch-a Touch-a Touch Me was so sexless I think my hymen regrew...

Okay, so if Key and Peele did Obama’s Anger Translator, can Jessica Walter be Clinton’s Attitude translator? Just keep her handy at all times to make faces and dismissive comments?

And what provoked it? Her making a joke at the expense of his tax evasion. A tiny little jab which doesn’t even hold a candle to the sorts of things he’s said about her.

I have switched to rum. Still not strong enough.