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OtisAtivanAndGelato
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clenching vigorously

Of course she does! If that happened to me, everyone I know would be sick of the story by now. And I would STILL tell them again.

Dear Cloris Leachman,

We are all Drake.

Tiny bit less tiny now!

Marco Rubio: Being Anti-Abortion Is Like Civil Rights, Women’s Suffrage

And there you are, climbing over people with a large beer, about to spill. How to remedy this? Cover it with a top — and don’t stop there. Stick a straw in it, and sip.

Seriously. Just. Fuck.

welcome the Tragedy Parasite Shoppe of Oddities and Curiosities

What’s your favorite way to prepare avocado?

Yeah, that might not have been a “food truck,” strictly speaking. Stranger danger aside, GOOD CRAB!

He’s all yours. But Captain Thrash is mine!

Well, the delicous, greasy, Texas-Pete-covered deviled crab I just bought from some guy in a van says otherwise!

I knew my decision to ignore important work and comment on the everything at Jez today would pay off. I regret nothing!

Two things:

Same. In fact, I should do it more often. It makes me feel good about myself. (“Look at me up here, sounding like an expert. Oh, wait! I am an expert.”)