No, I'm serious. Get the kids out of the room. Woody has that look in his eye again.

That may have been Bill Cosby. Hey-oooo!!!!! Get the kids out of the room!!!

Yes. Yes that show is horrible. I'll just take that initial comment as an insult then.

But he did sign the checks with that god damn Bee-Pen from Picture Pages. The whimsical noise it made as it moved across the paper was….disturbing.

We're allowed to form our own opinions based on the available information and allowed to freely say those opinions. Also, there is a trail of reports going back decades which will cut down on the validity of that "smear job" comment you crossed out. Also, he most certainly settled a civil suit some years back.

Take a f&*king break, internet. Settle down for a bit and breathe.

Depending on your taste, that's either a compliment or a severe insult. Hmmmm… (continues vomiting)

Bazinga! No that's not it. I mean..(opens mouth and a violent stream of vomit explodes out. Doesn't stop for 15 minutes as I rotate my head like a sprinkler).

You're tearing me apart.

Wiseau mentions that he had a bad interview the day prior to this one (before this one crashed and burned as well). Does anybody know who the other interview was with? I'm just curious how badly that one went as well. Just rubbernecking really.

There are rumors that his background is that of pinto but he denies this. Many think he's more likely re-fried or even lima. Personally, I think he escaped from a dark storage room in the back of Jim Henson's Creature Shop. Even having seen him live, I still hold to this theory. Pretty sure I saw some strings.

Robert Smith's The Cure branded Super-Soaker. Disguise your tears as fun. EXTREME ENNUI!

So long as you use the term "butt-hurt" and some generalization about Asians in your post you should be good. Then be sure to grossly over-react to anyone that disagrees.

Yeah. I sit outside by the ticket booth and silently shake my head disapprovingly every time someone buys a ticket. It's wicked time-consuming.

(Loudly burps. Rolls eyes and grunts)

jesus fracking christmas

He's a Hutt but I think their mind tricks are pretty good too.

Has anyone seen Rodman since his last visit to the Best Country?

Thank god. Now I can actively not see this.

She might need to pick up a dictionary and nail down the definition of the word "gift". She could have at least included a free copy of the soundtrack for Shanghai Surprise. Of course, a real gift would be the gift of silence until death. That would be super.