Perfect face for that absurd level hyperbole. Here’s a second one that also deserves that face: 

Things I’d rather read/hear about than Neymar drama:

I was born in New Hampshire and lived there until I was 23. Cocaine should probably be legal because there isn't much else to do. 

Was it at least TB12 brand cocaine?

the kicking community

Breydyn. Otherwise accurate

Well, anyone invested in something would of course talk up buying it.  If a bunch of people buy and the price goes up he can always sell for less of a loss.

His name is Cooper and he grows up to repeatedly commit return fraud at Walmart. Also, he votes for a YouTube personality for president in 2028.

The largest irony of all is that Parkey wasn’t at fault.

That kid's name? Lance Armstrong.

it’s that Bears coach Matt Nagy is a madman, an Ahab figure, from whom something fundamental was taken

Many people are saying he’s the best kicker. You hear it more and more.

Never attribute to kayfabe that which is adequately explained by the mere existence of the Raiders.

everybody is putting on a happy face as they travel to Winnipeg

No way does a storm trooper actually throw a pitch into the strike zone.

How about Nacional Miami? It’s unique, it reminds you of Internazionale Milan which is what they’re going for but it also pays homage to Miami’s latin heritage.

There is so much buzz around the Browns and Mayfield that I am now anticipating a 5-11 season with Mayfield either injured or benched by Week 10. The universe will not tolerate a timeline that has the Browns succeeding.

“They forget you've gotta win," said the Cleveland Browns quarterback.

It’s going to be underwater in 20 years so who gives a shit

I mean yeah, the Miami team’s stadium was always going to be in Florida.