The ways he’s looking at her, though.

“He stresses that his family members were legal immigrants.”

Agreed. It was kind of corny, but it wasn't offensive on any level. He must've done something else before this, and they were looking for a reason to get rid of him

been here since day one, living in the greys with trolls and lunatics. i just want to participate, please.

I also can't name a single female writer that inspires me. I can't name a male writer who inspires we either. I am a sentient hunk of cheese that someone plugged directly into the Internet. I am inspired by mold and bacteria.

I feel so weird when the NFL does something right for a change.

Donald Trump is my sister. Oh.my.God.

He’s an imbecile. Literally the only thing he actually knows is how to promote himself. We might as well vote for Kim Kardashian.

I agree, he’s probably a full blown fascist at this point. I regret the error.

Trump believes cats can play the piano! He's seen it on the Internet.

Everybody knows there are no lies on the Internet.

he uses computers all the time. computers love him. he has fantastic computers, with many many friends.

I think it’d be an interesting idea if during storms Seamless/Grubhub/any other online food ordering sites put up a little notice on the payment & tip page being like, “FYI - it’s terrible outside and the weather is definitely making your delivery person’s job difficult! Since he or she depends on tips, won’t you…

These guys are at work & could probably use the money, so as long as you make it worth their while, why not? 50% tip seems about right. Minimum $10, not matter what.

It all depends on where you are. If you’re somewhere that can handle the snow sure, it’s fine. Just tip more than average. When I delivered pizzas as a kid I would make a fucking killing during snowstorms.

As a former delivery driver for several years in the 90's...Fuck you for making me risk life and limb for your $5.99 plain pie and offering me a whole dollar for my efforts. I’d rather go home with no money. Man up and open a can of soup.

There should be a special state law that says if you make a delivery guy deliver without tipping him in the middle of a storm, he should legally be able to throw you down the stairs. The higher up you live, the more steps he gets to use.

You spelled 98% wrong.

That was extremely clever and funny!

It’s mostly done either (a) with contraband or (b) with non-contraband MacGyver’d into being tattoo equipment. It’s actually amazing how good people get at prison tattooing. See: http://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/g…