I’m going to be honest with you here. I’ve never actually heard an actual human voice say that name out loud, so it could be pronounced “bash bimby” and I wouldn’t even argue. 

Doesn’t Bad Baby (I refuse to spell it like she does) have a bed time or something? She has school tomorrow or nah? Why is she still up?

MBJ: I don’t only date white women.

I’m must be old (30) because I didn’t even know people still shopped there. Is it a youth thing? Are the youths still shopping there? I’ve never been able to fit anything in that store and the one time that I did, it broke down on me in like two months. Their bras just aren’t great quality. My titties just refuse to…

I’ve never been a performer and don’t have a hair or makeup team, but when Nicki Minaj looks at herself in a mirror before she steps out on stage, what does she see? Just because a professional does it, doesn’t mean it’s good. She doesn’t look good here and I would have refused to let the world see me looking a hot…

“Last week’s episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians featured a segment (skit?) dedicated to the infidelities of...”

What is this feeling that I’m having? I think...I think...I’m stanning. I’m officially a ponytail. Is that what us Ariana stans call ourselves? Ponytails.

Fan: Girl, they been playing your shit at MAGA rallies.

Pregnancy is just too hard and dangerous to be having one so another kid has someone to play with. Crew-neck will be just fine. (Unless she wants another one, of course.)

You can read or nah?

I think it’s fine for him to set limits with fans and I didn’t think he was that rude, but this is just so awkward. My second hand embarrassment is through the roof right now.

But this family in particular throw around money a lot and I feel like they buy each other these expensive gifts often. So, how cheap are they really?

I’m a poor, so I don’t know the rich handle things, but why wouldn’t Kris just buy herself her dream car if she already has the money? I don’t get it. What was she waiting for? These people buy each other cars every 6 days, but are always being chauffeured. I think if I had Kardashian /Jenner money, I would be happy…

Hopefully now every teenager in my life will stop telling me that his ex-girlfriend is a lying ass liar and realize that XXXtension cord was a violent fuck and the world is probably a little safer with him gone.

I do love Jada, but this is a quality read. I respect it. 

Melania: Boycott T.I.

I’m interested.