I used to live near you. Right across from the high school on 4th Ave.

Her name is Alison Ettel and she sells cannabis tinctures for dogs.

This is like the 1989 World Series of Becky Bullshit. And no matter who wins, I just hope that a goddamn earthquake hits.

I wasn’t aware that alpaca were Pokemon.

There was no second shot, meaning that there was no “first” shot.

I’m on Team Disney here, if only because then I’ll be able to get Star Wars: Original Original Trilogy on Blu-Ray.

That is simply not even close to true.

Unpopular opinion:

Goths refer to it as the “evil Daystar”

You don’t even want to know the regimen involved when goths go on beach holiday.

It is worth noting that every Floridian age 12 and older has, at some point in time, referred to Publix as “Pubix.”

I’m more than happy to drop a dime on Brad and Karen. No cookies needed.

Here’s what you do....

I’ve got $10 that says the officer called Mr Spurlock “boy.”

Hobby Lobby is the sundown town of crafts supply stores.

Because “Hitler” only takes up 6 characters in a lede.

I wasn’t aware that we really needed a “new” Hitler.

That only applies to government officials. That wouldn’t stop Cohen from a conspiracy to commit bribery charge.

I went to a mediocre-at-best law school and graduated in the middle of my class and my legal experience is in personal injury law and debt collection. So I’m about as comparable to Michael Cohen in terms of the calibre of my pedigree as you’ll find. So you can believe me when I say this.

And that’s all I have to say about that.