Your username is amazing. Camp Anawanna for life.

Not enough stars.

Same! Only time I’ve ever punched someone in my life. This guy grabbed my ass, I turned around and said “don’t touch me.” He then proceeded to look me in the eye, grab it again and say “I can do whatever I want.” So I cocked my hand back and punched him square in the throat. Fun times. That was just last year.

I mean, it makes a difference. If it’s Idris Elba, we may have to upgrade the jalapeño to a ghost pepper to get the same effect. If it’s Rip Taylor, we can downgrade to a poblano.

Once upon a time when I was a restaurant manager, we would SEVERELY decrease our delivery range to about a 5-10 street, 3 avenue (it was Manhattan) radius in a snowstorm. That said, the tips these guys got despite the weather were bleak. Please, please tip your delivery guys (I like the 50% idea) and try to order from…

Important question: who is the narrator of the audiobook?

I quit in September and used an app called “Smoke Free.” It’s worth spending the $3.99 for the full version and it tracks your cravings, how much money you save, how many cigarettes you haven’t smoked, etc. in addition to giving you goals for the day and ideas for different things to do when you’re craving a…

I do both. The guy I’m currently dating I met on OKC, but the last five or so before him I met at bars or wherever. The nice thing with the OKC guy is that he’s OBVIOUSLY interested in dating and is more available across the board. Two of the “real life” guys ended up admitting to being married a couple months into…

Your mother. I’m crying laughing.

My 15 year old self told the parents “He had just played and wanted to take a shower, so I let him take one in your house”.

My jam was the Barbie Glamour Home (complete with bedroom that I think turned into a bathroom? You could flip the wallpaper. It was pretty neat):

I LOVED Perfume Pretty Barbie because that adjustable dress was amazing. Like, she could go from night club to Met Gala in one pull.

I’ve been scoping your tree monkeys out for weeks, but your security detail seems impenetrable. Time for plan B...

Oh how I loved Quints. I cut all their hair off, though. I was kind of a monster of a child.

That LPS rabbit hole... I remember all of those toys so vividly. Pretty sure I had about 95% of the 1992/1993 playsets. (Except the monkeys in the tree. I remember my cousin had those and I was trying to figure out a way to steal them from her. LPS heists do not go as planned.)

Loved the OG Littlest Pet Shop. That’s all my grandfather bought for me for at least two Christmas/Birthday cycles.

Baby Heather. She was like 40 lbs of pure, creepy joy. There was a switch on her back and she would either act like an infant or a toddler. Talking dolls, man.

James Corden is fine.

I’m 30 and spent a huge chunk of my childhood on AOL and AIM, but I almost never send messages without punctuation. I will write “yaaaassssss!” and other ridiculous words all over the place, but the only time I skip punctuation is when I’m getting inundated with stupid texts and need that shit to stop (usually in the…

I was going to say the exact same thing.