Nova Scotia Duck Trolling Retriever

Wouldn’t the obvious conclusion of most women upon discovering these be that “Wait, does this guy have a live in girlfriend who’s just out of town”?

Obviously he’s playing it up for the Tiktok fame, but overall this is a positive thing. I wish guys gave enough of a shit about personal hygiene when I was in my early 20s. Not everyone is so chill about their period, and I would’ve died of embarrassment if I was 21 at some guy’s house and my period arrived…

Stephen Miller is stuck in high school - Santa Monica High School, to be exact. He’s never quite understood that he didn’t have many friends because he was a conservative in a liberal school. In reality, he didn’t have many friends because he was a raging ass, and there’s ample video evidence to prove it.

In the…

You do that Dolly. I would buy that fucking issue.

Okay, so can we get a promise from Jezebel not to tank her and Biden both with the “Kamala is a cop” stuff?! Lots riding on this ticket, folks.

Luckily, TikTok’s algorithm is so good that I am in almost* zero danger of running across any videos that are just white girls dancing. I’m on, like, lesbian witch horticulturist BLM TikTok now.

People who whine constantly about the already well known and pre-established indignities and frustrations of air travel?

I knew this would be the outcome from the very beginning. We all did...and yet, I’m still enraged. We need a revolution at the ballot box in November. Anything less is just going to be more of the same with more and more of us either falling into the cracks of society or on our way.  Clearly, the American experiment…

Listen, the #boymom and #girldad shit is dumb as fuck but this is fucking unnecessary.

If you chose to save Kanye over Michael Jackson’s music we cannot be friends, you are DUMB

This is gonna be the most cathartic bracket ever. Immediately after voting I was filled with a feeling of peace and weightlessness, albeit temporarily. I guess imagining a world without YouTubers really was that therapeutic!

One of my friends was selling tickets for a booze cruise just about a week before Halloween. He told me it was a costume party. It was like $35. All you can drink for 3 hours. So we figured we would go as Skipper and Gilligan. I was Skipper. He was Gilligan.

I know we all like to make fun of Marianne Williamson, but she’s the only candidate who is serious about finding the Chaos Emeralds.

This Isn’t For Us!

The original All That will never be a good as Roundhouse.

The best: a pillsbury french bread “from a tube” loaf, still doughy and hot. i split a stick of butter lengthwise, stuffed it inside and let it rest for a few seconds to melt. I ate it in the shower (water off) and then took a shower.

The worst: Kraft mac (dinosaur shapes) with cracked black pepper and chocolate syrup

All around solid advice here.

“It’s a candy necklace of a movie: sweet but chalky.”