On that topic, I’d like to see Andy Dick play Lee in the movie.

The header image is from the next Star Trek movie, right?

This is so incredibly detailed I have no choice but to assume it is 100% fact.

Gentlemen, you can’t post quotes here; this is the comments section!

Wait til the audience member gets the bill. “I thought the cover charge included this!”

I hope those trophies are solid lead. I’d love to see someone try to steal one and can’t even lift it. Next year’s competition could be a trophy so heavy the rule is simply “if you can take home this trophy, then you can take home this trophy”.

Ask not for whom the Taco Bell tolls. It tolls for thee.

Mitt Romney: Hey, it worked for Nixon!

¡Ay, caramba!

I can’t blame them. How do you make money when a 9 year old comes in, orders a dozen chocolate sundaes, and when given the bill, points to a teddy bear and says “Mr. Twinkles will be paying for this” ?

I’m rather partial to Sgt. Johnson’s Halo ODST commercial, myself.

Big McLargeHuge!

Well, we’ve heard that before: you buy an appliance with easy-to-follow directions, and you get it home, and you need a Ph.D to figure it out. Usually, this “easy direction” stuff is a big lie...

The Dutch have an expression; he who hauls apples, eats apples.

Oh, I’m not talking about getting stuck by suddenly stopped traffic in a busy intersection. I can appreciate that. Happens to everyone. I’m talking about an intersection with virtually no traffic! People who ignore the white line across the lane and stop for the red light where THEY think is appropriate. I’ve even…

Speaking of turns, how about people who don’t realize the white lines across the lane at an intersection means “stop before this line”? I frequently have to make a wide turn in the intersection near my house because people have stopped far past the line and are clearly in the intersection. I’ve had people furiously…

A Muppet president?!

(wham!)

But feeding him to giant spiders without the benefit of counsel...
is not the way we do things in America!

How’d the front plate get bent?