Me fail Nielsen Ratings? That's unpossible!

"This way to the Encore"

They'll be down to 182 before you can blink.

This is all Napster's fault, isn't it?

This simply reminds me that there are voters who think if we put rich businessmen in office, they'll make us all rich!

While he may be the first president to complete his term without a single piece of his suggested legislation being passed, his underlings are doing a fine job of destroying their respective departments and agencies.

I'm gonna make a rough guess at … "all". All of them.

and then they'll take it right back 2 years later. Sigh.

To life immortal!

South Carolina senator, it should be noted.

Double plus ungood.

"Svre, things are pretty stable here in the Roman Empire, bvt my sitvation hasn't improved remarkably lately, and nobody is complimenting my on my lack of edvcation, slaves are getting all the breaks and have an easy life, and I hear they're letting Visigoths join the Roman Army. I mean, wovld yov let yovr davghter…

"looks like we have to … plant ivy"

If this is a photograph of her, I think the main question should be "where are the Japanese soldiers guarding her?" The Marshall Islands were occupied by the Empire of Japan at the time. In preparation for their eventual attempt to seize much of Asia for the "Greater East Asia Co-Prosperity Sphere", they had forbidden…

If he knew who he was, why did he have to ask for his papers?!

It's a Will the Real Martian Please Stand Up? reunion!

Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should.

If they would make this a felony, I think we've found the next great tool for disenfranchising voters.

It's 6 feet down, though.

Not exactly. He finished out his term and retired to become a lobbyist.