Happened at two weddings I attended.

Ticks are at elevated levels in a lot of places right now. They could get ticks being at outdoor concerts, for example. Over the weekend I found a tick on me after going to a gallery show in the city. The gallery had a small yard, maybe 30ft long, with a couple bushes.

Nothing makes me want to punch someone squarely in the mouth like repeating the same thing over and over and over while you talk over someone like a toddler. It was the thing my sister used to do as a kid that assured I went into a helicopter-fisting rage every time.

I’ve heard from one of his neighbors that he’s currently dicking around with a lot of women on the side from his main squeeze.

It’s true, Norman Reedus is amazing. When walking dead was pretty spanking new and he was mostly just known as that Other Asshole Brother on the show, he was at Wizard World Chicago at the same Hyatt bar as everyone else, chatting and shaking hands with anyone who passed by. A newlywed couple were just married and…

I mean, call it a “Lob” instead of a Rachel and it’s totally back. Long layered bob? Yeah, that’s a Rachel.

I disagree. I also went to art school, drew nudes, dated nudes, saw my friends nude, and modeled nude, but a teacher saying “get naked in this room alone with me” is still really setting off alarm bells for me. I know they had other options, but that’s still not a good option, and I plastered enormous 5ft tall images…

Unless the favor is more food, always skip the favors. I really don’t want soaps and ornaments and bags of useless shit.

Wait, funerals aren’t supposed to have booze?

I had one of those, but it was religious and smug. Just choking you with how smug it was for being the bestest at their religion ever. “We didn’t host properly because we were too busy giving it all to Jesus!”

God yes. We did not toss my garter. 1. The garter was made of lace from multiple generations of brides, I wasn’t parting with it.

I’ve been to more than one wedding now where the bouquet hits the floor as every single woman takes a collective step back.

I like a chatty stylist as well, but I’m an extrovert. I also find that the hair cuts and colors I most like gravitate me towards other loudmouth extroverts. Really quiet and subdued stylists are sometimes more visually bold than they let on, but more often they were the ones who tried to talk me out of what I wanted.…

I feel like if you’re just starting, it would get so overwhelming so fast, so you can just start with a basic kit that answers 3 questions:

I admit my makeup was way more bold when I was an unnatural color. It did feel like I needed that much more.

“I guess you’re dying alone, buddy, because you believe made-up bullshit where you can be whatever kind of creepo slob with no repercussions because there is a single, solitary person on the whole of this planet that was created JUST FOR YOU.

I would love to foster kittens again, but Mr.hag-butthole is all “No, you can’t watch them because then we’ll have more cats.”

Seriously? You want to cry reverse racism?

But those same dudes will touch their faces at some point in the day. The beard is not the problem here. That man has poopy face regardless.

Wow.