I'm disappointing. I thought this was going to be someone saying in a threatening tone "Go ahead, unwrap your present" with the wad of paper growled ominously.

When she says her and their dad love politics with "and I know we have to take some responsibility for them" -

Okay, are you asking women if they like them or telling us how to fuck?

My dad did a lot of the same being in HVAC. There were a lot of restaurants and hotels where he had SEEN THINGS.

Way too many women in my lifetime were asked "When are you having a baby / are you pregnant/ are you trying / are you going to do it already?" WHILE recovering from a miscarriage. Let's all agree people; these questions are rude, insensitive, and none of your damn business.

Sounds like my friend. He has a thing for petite women - 5'4" and under, thin and pixie-like. He's a 6'8" beast of a human, and his daughter was LONG and still is. I think he hopes she'll be as tall as her two-year checkup predicts (which is 6ft), but I don't see how he'll ever get another woman to have children with…

I don't regret who my first time was with, but I do feel a little bad about how it came up, I had been trying to break up with my then-boyfriend for weeks on end, which meant I had to drive 2 hours home from college every weekend, and he would find some excuse as to why we couldn't hang out when we had planned to. In…

I saw it, but I hold firm that burgundy is NOT Marsala. Marsala is a grey 90's Mary Kay blush and burgundy is fab. I will fight anyone who says otherwise, and I don't even have to put my first-lady hair up before I do it.

Yes! She passed out fliers with her anal y /n? comic on them years ago and it still hangs on my fridge because that is my marriage perfectly summed up.

You're asking me? I'm rocking a haircut not unlike Laura Bush circa 2007.

My favorite web comic artist being highlighted on Jezebel. My joy is immeasurable.

He's so would write an article about how lost young adults are now because they didn't come to worship at his feet.

Okay, if you're going to paint every rose, burgundy, and raisin hue with a broad Marsala brush we are going to have words. That dress won't be Marsala-colored until it's been washed at least a dozen times. With non-like colors.

To those bashing the makeup, I argue that makeup is a great feminist tool; a filled in brow and a bold lip project looks of disgust yards father than a fresh face. I for one am a huge fan of deep reds. I want people who only take a quick glance to wonder if my mouth is coated in the blood of my enemies.

Truth. I tore the curtain rod out of my ceiling when using my lelo, and I didn't tear it down with my hands.

And that would be why concealed carry classes flatly tell you that if you point your gun at someone, you shoot them, and you shoot to kill. You don't want your attacker saying you over-reacted.

1. Corgis are actually kind of big, right? That would be heavy

I've got nothing. I read the title and made a long, strange noise in the back of my throat somewhere between a gargle and a hiss.

I used to freelance for a very small publishing company, and one of their hard and fast rules was that you could not develop a character by raping them.

Ragey. I am ragey. This reminded me so much of Gilda Radner's trips to eleven different doctors and not one of them testing past the usual tests.