"Listen, I hear what you're saying, but how am I supposed to get my penis wet if I can't just force any strange woman I want to talk to me?" - yeah, that stuff.

It looks like blush? Like, 90's blush, the kind that went with that brown-red lipstick. It's also the color of the tiny roses on your navy 90's babydoll dress.

OMG, it is the EXACT shade of red my family's bronco was in the 90's.

"Bet the girls love him"

Jesus. This lady's life reads like one of those serious movies producers make for a chance at an Oscar, and when you watch it you hate everyone and everything in the movie until it bleeds into your own life and you hate yourself for watching in the first place.

I mean I could do all those things when dining out.

Disagree. Tater tot hotdish is THE hotdish of MN.

Well that alone shows how little she knows him - the correct casserole was tater tot.

Seeing how well his son came out, Daddy Bieber really shouldn't be that shocked that his dog wasn't well-behaved either. You get out what you put into a dog. Or a kid. Anything really. Point being that the suckfest started with dad.

Grounded for as long as I feel like, no technology, deleted accounts of all kinds, no games, no extra curriculars like dances, sports games, have to spend weekends doing whatever parents wanted, staying in the living room with parents until bed, and the only time outside would be yard and volunteer work - my choice.…

I'll take Jumping to Conclusions for $400, Alex.

I told my story last year, but the worst Thanksgiving was the one where my then-aunt baited my uncle into breaking down and admitting that he had been having an affair between sobs. With his children there to watch.

Holy shit. Kudos to your amazing family that he wasn't rolled into a rug and dropped in a ravine that night.

This just confirms my stand on Hollywood ; it's not that Jennifer Aniston isn't a beautiful woman all on her own, but anyone can be Jennifer Aniston stunning with Jennifer Aniston money. Give me the best products, best clothes, endless money for skin treatments and hair salons, the best food products, a dietitian and…

I was one of the kids for whom math did not make a damn lick of sense after elementary school. My ACTs made it clear that I could do algebra and trigonometry just fine, but my geometry score was so low I might as well have answered "C" for everything or made a smiley face. And statistics and word problems? Yeah, I…

I'm having flashbacks of Roxy Heart describing Fred right before she shot him. "His eyes were wild!"

I laughed out loud and choked a little, and now I feel really bad about myself. So I've called the police on you for assaulting my conscience.

What am I supposed to be seeing? Did he scratch at a budding zit?

Truly and honestly, why go? Yes, they're family, but come on. If these people weren't, would you take their abuse and share a meal with them? Does the title alone make them people who are allowed to disrespect you?

I gave them a star because I agree that if you think you're at risk of doing something terrible, you don't put yourself in the situation to act terribly.