Nah, those Hollywood liberal elites only get a pass if they make a movie with Mel Gibson and Clint Eastwood’s Chair. Which... is unfortunately not that unlikely, so you got me.

Hey, the first amendment protects all religions! Protestants and Catholics! That’s all the religions, right? Did I miss one?

lol, I would like to make it out of the grays at some point, but at what cost?

Fuck, didn’t know that about either of them. I was just trying to throw out some more famous “Marks” for the sake of a joke, but I don’t really give a shit about any of them, so fair enough.

Fair enough, but even so, if I were told a “mystery guest” was coming for dinner, BUT I CAN’T KNOW WHO IT IS UNTIL 20 MINUTES TO GO, hold your butts, everyone, its...MARK...Zuckerberg...? Not a Ruffalo or even... god, a Wahlberg?”

“Big Plate”, omg. When my grandmother died, her china was split between my sister and a cousin. They’ve never used it.

Seriously. I wouldn’t even give him leftovers. Mark fucking Zuckerberg shows up at my door and wants ME to make HIM dinner? Fuck off.

He’s like a republican cane toad. How much do you think trump supporters would pay to lick his sweaty forehead?

THE FUCK DID I JUST WATCH?

I had surgery recently, and I still have about 50 oxycodone left. I figure I can either use them for barter, or to kill myself. Depends on what the apocalypse looks like.

Not going to crucify you, but if you think about it for half a second, abortion being *legal* is not the same as it being *legal and accessible*, and it is not the latter for too many women - by design of anti-abortion advocates who keep doing all they can to make it as inaccessible as possible, especially for the…

I did not know what “tessellated” meant, so I *looked it up.* Which means I have more intellectual curiosity than the entire administration combined. And that makes me depressed.

This sounds right. I actually used a fake SSN at a job once, at a major retail clothing chain. It was an accident - I was in high school, and thought I had memorized mine, but wrote it one number off on my application. Still got the job, and had SS taxes taken out of my paycheck. I realized the mistake a few…

God yes, all of this. I’m still in the middle of trying to figure all this shit out. I get anxiety-related muscle spams in my hands (usually while driving, so I pretty much don’t do that anymore), and it’s not ‘normal’ or easy to explain. I mostly feel like shit for being such a useless disappointment to everyone. …

Ha, I was just thinking he probably thinks he’s too “classy” for meth, but then again, it’s cheaper and lasts longer, and if there’s anything we know about 45, he’s fucking cheap.

If there’s any silver lining, it’s that everyone named Renesmee will probably HATE those awful books (if not also their parents). “Please just fucking call me ‘Renee’, and if you make even one Twilight joke, I will stab you.”

Me, clicking this headline: “Dammit, I love Chewing Gum, but I still haven’t seen the second season yet because it’s not... WAIT A MINUTE DOES THIS MEAN IT’S FINALLY UP ON NETFLIX OMG!!!!!!!!”

I use captions most of the time, too. I had a friend/roommate for a few years who was hearing impaired, so we always used captions when we watched something together, and I grew to prefer it. Now I get kind of anal if I miss or mishear something because I couldn’t read it as well.

I’m in. I don’t have any firearms, but I do have a 12" rusty railroad spike in my car (don’t ask about the how or why - I don’t even remember), and I imagine it would be good for stabbing.

Yeah, but the agent was using his sex object in a manner not approved by the Real!American Fungelical Association of Repressed Dipshits.