Chicago cab drivers are despicable individuals. "Oh the card reader isn't working and I took you 3 miles in the wrong direction, how about I drive you to a sketchy ATM with the meter running and you can pay me in cash that I won't claim on my taxes. No? I'll drop you off on the side of the Dan Ryan Expressway then."

Kim Kardashian's fame was planned, therefore porny.

The injury itself bummed me out, but this comment made it dusty in here. It's been a long time since I was young enough to be as big a fan of a player as I could as a kid. Most pro athletes are younger than me now and they all just feel more human. Even this tiny glimpse into what childhood fandom was like made me…

It's a shame the Mets didn't make the playoffs, Bartolo's boobs can tell if it's already raining.

Anyone know how RedZone figures into the TV deals for CBS and Fox? The NBC and ESPN games are unaffected because RedZone only shows the 1pm and 4pm (Eastern) Sunday games , but you'd think they'd rather have people watching their broadcasts (with commercials) than watching RedZone (without commercials) all day instead.

Did you accidentally substitute "Deadspin" for "Cardinals Fans?

"That's nothin" - John McSherry

I hope the players know their passwords to gain Access to their new devices.

this shit right here is what's been missing from the Deadspin comment section since the Kinja revolution. Well done.

Elite comment.

That guy either has too many teeth or they're aligned wrong but either way I'm going to have nightmares about that mouth, and they might not even anything to do with him covering up an alleged sexual assault and finding it a laughing matter.

I really don't give a shit about this.

I could punt a football 70+ yards and hit exactly the spot I want to.

dick drawing

What if my B sample shows that I don't read Reddit?

Lacky: "Welker popped Molly"

The Seahawks logo should be much higher up, possibly right above the Pats logo, but this is otherwise pretty accurate

I wish I could get this entire thing placed on a poster.

I just checked to see if our Murph had him too. We do not happen to be in the same league, but our Murph is definitely the token deadbeat.

Good look for the NBA The NFL would have let 30 guys break their legs over two seasons first, say it wasn't a problem and that they're "devoted to player safety" then finally change the rule at halftime of a Week 12 Monday Night game because it happened to Andrew Luck 45 minutes earlier.