Where have you been all my life? Please tell me in New York...

Please tell me she was there at the same time as Kaitlin Olson. That would just make me squee so hard.

The acting all sounds incredibly forced. Not promising for a 30-second trailer.

Or me, who hasn't shaved in three weeks and has "I've been chugging NyQuil all month to get to sleep" face.

Because his parents had sex.

I hate pumpkin spice EVERYTHING and any sort of spice/cinnamon/"fall" scent. It's all garbage. My roommate just bought about seventy years worth of pumpkin spice soap, though, so that'll be fun. Nothing like smelling like the inside of a craft shop in Amish country to land a sexual partner.

Lindy, when you saw 12 Years a Slave, did you stand outside the theater after and admonish people for not being ashamed to be white? I only ask because that's the reaction you had after the Trayvon Martin verdict.

The URLs of Gawker Media articles are almost never SFW. Can we do something about that, please?

Also, can you please include something about not taking pictures of the mise en scène on your table with the flash on and setting it up like it's a goddamn photo studio to get the best Instagram shot (repeating the process several times to get the best possible angle for your 40 followers)? I thought everyone knew…

I've followed Kathy Bates' "start from the outside and work your way in" from Titanic my entire young adult and adult life and it's worked just fine. Kids, listen to Kathy Bates.

Yes, it is. However, it's almost better than having a "regular season" because the show excels when it features the group in situations where they can just talk and play off each other without having ridiculous plot devices to overshadow them. Last week's sole plot device was Marshall trying to get Ted, Barney, and…

No. The final season takes place more or less in real time over the weekend of a wedding (not Ted's). The Mother is in the wedding band and has met Lily, but nobody else yet. He probably won't actually meet her until the series finale.

If I didn't know Taran Killam was Mr. Robin Sparkles, I wouldn't ignore the loud pinging in my head right now. Maybe it's just the sweater.

Ivy grad school (liberal arts), top 50 USNWR undergrad.

History (undergraduate); American Studies (graduate) ;).

If it makes a difference, I'm poorly connected, book smart mostly, and from a slightly-less-than-middle-class background.

I look best in navy.

Which would be?

As IF!

I'm fat and Ivy-educated. Would you trust me?