Ah. My mom had her first at 24. Then her 8th at 36. Once she called herself “the baby machine.”

I found Mark Chelgren’s elementary school yearbook photo.

My first thought when I saw the photo above was “Busy Phillips? Swoon.” I’m in!

Anecdotal, but I have two nephews who are both 19 years younger than their dads. It happens.

Oh. Hey, look who wrote before he looked up the CWHL. Nevermind. That said, I’m still pulling for the NWHL.

Maybe also expand into Canada? Probably good that they started small, unlike, say, the XFL which went so big so fast, it wasn’t sustainable.

I clicked over and watched the video of the shouty haircut. Do they need to move the mic closer to him? Turn down the music bed a little? I couldn’t make it to the end. But it was a nice reminder to never watch entertainment “news” ever.

If I cut a minute-thirty of my mile time I still wouldn’t be at a 7:01 pace. I’m slow, but I’m honest.

Is this where we get to say “Bye, Felicia”? Are we still saying that?

I don’t really care about this article as much as I do the picture accompanying it. What the hell is it with rich dudes and their $8 haircuts? Surely they can skimp on other things in order to hold on to their wealth.

The runner-on-second thing seems like an idea straight out of beer-league softball where all the players have to get up for work the next morning and need to get home.

“corned-beef dirigible Donald Trump, a skill-free inheritance baby with a virtually unbroken lifelong track record of incompetence and failure”

This is the only reason I still visit Twitter:

Got it. And now you know my secret adult-film identity, too.

Sure. Again, no offense intended. Just going for a little jokey. I don’t know anything about him beyond what I see here and I know even less about his family history. Ansel, I know as a first name. Elgort is new on me.

I apologize if my “joke” was offensive. I like anagrams and his name is so unusual that my impulse is to see how I can rearrange the letters. “Eternal Slog” seemed to fit the nature of the video, so here we are explaining ourselves.

Jeebus, I’m glad 9-year-old me did not have access to this nightmare scenario.

When can we expect his first porno? Gay or otherwise.

You can rearrange the letters in Ansel Elgort to spell Eternal Slog.

I grew up in Southern California and as a child was genuinely worried that there would be an earthquake and we would fall into the sea. I haven’t lived there in more than 20 years and, with apologies to my family who still lives there, the sea can have it if it will take these people with it.