“Heh. Nice one, kid.”

Man, they keep pushing the “young teen” and “underage teen” angle like it excuses his sexual molestation of young girls and the family’s attempts to cover it up. It’s really a new level of gross for a clan that was already advanced-level gross.

Oh god, oh god, OH GOD! That Northgate Weight Watchers. I’ve been there. It led me to just ride my bike more and eat less cheese. So I guess it worked? Anyway, it’s gone now so we’re all safe.

This will not smell bad even a little bit.

The real hero here is the copywriter.

My 8-year-old wants to be your 9-year-old when she grows up.

Those aren't Nick Symmonds' shoes. I'm guessing based on the name on them. Anyway, Symmonds runs for Brooks now.

I was probably about 6 years old and I wanted to get one of my siblings in trouble. I guess it didn't really matter which one (I'm one of eight). So I decided to write one of their names on our light gray rug with pee so they would get blamed for it. The sibling I chose? My sister Judy. More than 40 years later, I am…

Mind your business clown. Sage advice. Those business clowns won't mind themselves.

Do you think when they wrote "heart sell" they meant "hard sell"? I'm just wondering because it is possible they are that dumb.

I do need new glasses, but that looked like "Cod Maserati" to me. I also don't know much about football.

Before today I had never heard a Nickelback song. I want my innocence back.

Not so much "funny" as much as "every meeting I was in for two years when I worked at EA Mobile."

Did he dial 9-1-1 to get an operator? Maybe they have concierge service for big shots?

I blame Connecticut.

Brett Favre? I sort of thought it was Kris Kristofferson.

"There will be a maximum break between innings of 2:05" except during the playoffs when commercial breaks between innings are a full minute longer than during the regular season. Or am I crazy? I suppose both are possible.

I first read that line as "the toughest job you'll ever lose which, in my somewhat limited experience, could also still apply.

There is also this: