Is "models who fuck rappers" a societal subcategory on the US Census yet? It should be.

Dan Blocker of TV's "Bonanza". Don't you fucking judge me. You don't know my life.

I probably would have dug up Paul Newman's corpse during the first six months or so if I'd had the opportunity, TBH.

I know no one will believe me, but I don't care: In the late 1980s I had hot, hot clandestine sex with a guy who looked EXACTLY like a young Paul Newman. I am talking <i>Cool Hand Luke, Long Hot Summer</i> Paul Newman. It was just like a fantasy, because the flesh-and-blood guy was hung like a goddamn stallion. It…

He looks SO much like Evan Peters as the school shooter in American Horror Story! Who I also fancied. I'm disturbed.

Yes!!! I once went down the Google rabbit hole and came across this guy. I spent a disturbingly lengthy amount of time looking for more pictures of him. My husband walks by and probably thinks, "Ah, she's looking at history, good for her..." if only he knew.

LOL DAT HAIR

Rom-Coms....

Fat bottomed Mike you make the rockin world go round. Get on your bike and ride.

I'm pretty sure I saw a guy do that when I was drunkenly walking back to my apartment in college....

Well, maybe you could pick up a darling little skirt suit and some stockings while you're out? Just pray extra hard once you get home and change.

Constant vigilance. Always have a pair of unappealing sweatpants nearby to throw over your whore-slacks. It's the only way.

Well you ARE in the comfort of your own home, so I'm pretty sure God is OK with you being a slut in there. Preferably when your children are gone so you don't taint their innocent minds with your sex body.

OH, FOR...

Whelp, I was going to hang out in my sexy sexy sex pants (stained in not one, but two places with Nutella) and watch season two of The Fall while my daughter is at a sleepover, but I guess I'd better change. Perhaps I can find some non-lustful dungarees somewhere. I mean, it's just me and the dogs here, but you never…

Guys, this is probably the only time I can brag about this (even though I try often), but when I was 19, some guy filmed a scene from a Lifetime movie in the cool hip clothing store I worked at and I was the bitchy store clerk (in real life AND in the movie). I was literally in 3 seconds of the movie but I was SO…

You should watch the Family Guy Porn Parody. Or the Spiderman, where instead of an upside down kiss, it's an upside blowjob.
"But RedWriter, how do you know this?"
During one rainy afternoon, I told my boyfriend I used to play drinking games to porn and he decided we should do that but with cartoon-themed ones.