Much the way today’s high school students are rallying to thwart gun culture, and millennials are trying to end racism and inequality perhaps today’s 11 year olds will grow up to destroy the internet.  Fingers crossed, li’l warriors

Red meat allergy carrier? Sounds like Nature has opened up a new front on our cancerous global occupation. Now if I could only contract an allergic reaction to whiskey, I’d be all set.

I’d settle for Eric.

Busted! It’s Jussie Smollett in a dog suit

Optics > Justice

Public spaces are now $4k/week comment sections? If people are giving $28 a throw to Bernie, I’m sure they have fifty cents to collectively, artfully tell the powers that be to go fuck themselves. It’s kinda like not realizing that declaring an unnecessary national emergency makes it possible for the opposition to do…

“Jeffrey”?

We can always watch Mr. T in DC Cab, when we’re feeling really down though. gotchoo, fam

*for companies with more than 100 employees

All of this seems really avoidable.

Well then you’re stupid or complicit or independently share its warped worldview. Congrats

Shhh you’re witnessing a giant shitbird in mid mating call in its natural habitat- let’s watch it involuntarily flex its poop vomiting muscles from behind this duck blind. Quietly hand me the flask please, and take your safety off

I, too, am thankful for denim!

Time to buy a new remote.

On a related note, did we ever get to the bottom of this mystery? https://gawker.com/5961233/why-no-orange-pie 

“Yay!” —Timmy Treadwell, somewhere in the bowels

A first born child is 50/50 at best- seems like a fair trade. 

Real dead.

Have you actually seen any of the avocado toast Tumblrs? They’re absolutely mesmerizing.

I’ve told the Korean players to avoid using any Korean in game, because they all need to be using Chinese and Chinese only in the future.