Don’t cry because it’s over, cry because I’m going to grey the shit out of everyone before I go.

So, you mean they didn’t get his consent before fucking him?

Right, and it’s not like there’s a history of the NFL or fans having a problem with rapists on the field, so it’s not like he’s going to lose his job.

Ugh. I live in the Tampa Bay Area and I am so tired of hearing about Winston. The local news just did a glowing report on the “Jameis you don’t know” and showed clips of him with kids, etc. It was such a propaganda piece, I gagged when I saw the commercials. But everyone here supports him as many are FSU alum and/or…

Honest question for legal Jezzies. Although I, personally, believe that Winston is a vile piece of shit, does he have a case here? I believe the victim, and I KNOW that FSU and local police did a spectacularly terrible job of “investigating,” but he wasn’t charged with a crime. Does this constitute libel or…

They're adults about to start a new round of cult members. Fuckem.

Dear Anna Duggar,

So they trotted out the downtrodden wife, thereby keeping her close and thus controllable, and the thirsty one and her gummy sister are carrying on the family tradition of playing it up for the cameras.

Right?! It’s hard to believe that the current incarnation of TLC is even a descendant of The Learning Channel.

Let me say this:

How could this happen? Well let’s see. Parents that oppress any expression of sexuality, including having the girls “protect” the boys by signalling when they should cast their eyes to the ground if a woman comes by. Masturbation is considered a sin... Family is cloistered far away from regular society in addition to…

TLC stands for “The Learning Channel.” This is an educational channel. Holy Shit.

Luckily, it appears she can still afford a shitload of Botox.

Yeah, I bet all of their hearts just broke when the TLC money stopped flooding in. Hence, this new plot to part fools and their money.

When their fans proselytize to me about the Duggar’s economy and lack of ostentatious purchases, they can be silenced by a mention of the family’s private plane.

I don’t want to watch any fucking Duggar shows until they air a special called, “We totally fucked up and are sorry we subjected you to the horrors of this family, here’s a show about how to treat abuse victims appropriately, love TLC.”

Oooh, the famous “what happened” instead of “what my husband did.” The passive voice is a staple of this genre.

Apparently, her own mother and father are in the tank for the Duggars.

Ugh. TLC, you and the Duggars are the worst. Both of you.