If I could choose one person from this here web’n-site to be friends with IRL, it would be you.

He should really try being a Greg Softy sometime.

I am actually one of the few readers/commenters around here that is somehow not a lawyer.

Ladies and gentlemen, the US government during business hours!

I would think stroking a dong would get you thrown out of a baseball game.

O sweet irony, let me count the ways.

I’m really glad to see someone else call Slumdog out on whatever bullshit it is. That is . . . not a good movie.

I want her to be my best friend.

Me too. This guy gives the rest of us isolated weirdos bad names. At least I’m a polite and kind isolated weirdo when interaction happens.

Reading this article helped me come to the realization that Man on Wire is one of my favorite movies ever.

Goddammit. Now there’s water coming from my face.

+1

Same. Except we called it “Tour de Franzia”.

Oh God. It suddenly got dusty in here.

This! That thing always feels like it’s detached when I’ve been with a lady.

good kinja.

And I just realized how depressing my life is that this is the only reaction I can get to a deadspin comment.

He just needs something to soothe him and calm him down. Maybe there’s some sort of soft, fuzzy thing he could drape on his neck. I don’t know what you’d call it, though.

I was thinking in that direction, but this is much better than anything I came up with.

+1

I’ve been both manager and server before. Both suck. Management sucks because you still have bosses, and they’re furious to get complaints. So, you really have to toe a line between keeping customers happy and not putting up with terrible people that go too far. I do not miss it at all, and I wanted to quit managing…

Are you people happy now? You finally got your bad team write-up.