My thought exactly. I really hope she starts wearing prosthetic bellies of different shapes and sizes, just to fuck with everyone. It could be one of the greatest works of performance art of our time.

nerdybirdy: buzzkill of seasons.

Sorry. What's that? I can't hear your negativity over the sound of my zen from kayaking. Can you try to snark a little louder?

Well, doesn't Labor Day weekend mark the unofficial end of summer? I realize the geologic season is different, but I thought we mostly counted September as the beginning of fall?

Plus, this fucking California drought. Fuck me, end this summer now. The world is shitty and violent, my state has no water, and every part of me is sweaty.

Great, now I want to drink all the whiskey

This summer was total crap for me. So much so that I have revised my previous goals for fall 2014 to the following three items;

I think she doesn't actually think she raped him, she just means that she was the instigator but still it's so incredibly inappropriate to use that word when you don't really mean it. Rape jokes just aren't funny! When will people stop using them? I get upset anytime anybody uses it and doesn't really mean it.

Do you think she misspoke and was going for femininity?

No worries! Either way, I was gonna have to defend that one eventually.

You're right. I was going to include that into my comment and totally forgot. Nobody's a dick on live TV if you can help it, especially a parent being questioned about her parenting. Either way, even if everything is true - if this kid has a warrant out & his mother is June freaking Cleaver, his reality is…

A parent who says a child is "welcome" at home when confronted by national media is in NO way necessarily the same thing as a parent that is loving, supportive, or safe to live with.

I think the key is "together", my SO went through a smoke weed all the time phase. It was tedious. Anyone who thinks stoned people are interesting to listen to, is a stoned person.

I've definitely met "emotionally maladapted, verbally abusive" stoners but not violent.

Drug policy - not the stupidest thing about America, but damned if it doesn't make a run for the title every year.

Don't forget this perfect moment of television:

I doubt it. A PR person would have done a background check first to flag anything exactly like this. According to the story, Miley saw him and picked him.

Does it vibrate, too?

Hell, I'd never shower with the guy. Or, for that matter, any other guy. Or girl. Hell no. That's just not how I roll. And I'm damn sure not about to shower in an open locker room. Hello, what about privacy? Who are these people who are showering in front of all these other people? Not me, that's who. Everyone rubbing…

she asked defensive tackle Kendall Langford and linebacker Alec Ogletree about Sam's showering schedule, and they told her that they weren't tracking it.