Jellyfish should only exist in captivity.

Remind me, we'll send him a red cap and a Speedo.

It's like a Star Trek pastiche. You can feel how utterly creatively bankrupt and drained of energy the franchise was back then.

I'm so glad I woke up in 1996 today.

Decades by Joy Division chronicles an imagined Joy Division reunion and retrospective years in the future, long after the band imploded and disappeared.

"The crisis of the week has taken away my empathic ability to observe the obvious! I can't be a counselor anymore!"

Rich guy asks for donations to make a self-indulgent movie about kids so poor they can't go to private school anymore Then gets millions of dollars in financing and keeps the donations.

This looks like a direct-to-video knock off from 1997.

I don't think Jenny Slate will talk, even at 40.

”I think all multi-cameras are wonderful. I do. For me, sometimes, I’ve done some shows where the audience might not know where to laugh. There’s a few shows that aren’t on the air anymore where they were really trying to stay away from jokes. I know that seems kind of crazy to say, but they were trying to stay away…

What gets me is that not only are the "jokes" often non-jokes, but people feel obliged to laugh at every step of the setup to something that isn't even remotely funny.

Needs a section about April March.

It's one of those albums that doesn't feel like it came from anywhere in time. It's just there in your collection as something that could've arrived yesterday or 30 years ago. Your brain can't quite pin it down.

One of the interesting things about growing up in the pre-Napster era was passing through music stores around my local university and seeing handwritten signs calling out genres that sounded mysterious and amazing to someone who had only really been exposed to commercial radio and VH1 / MTV.

The time dilation is a bitch though. 30 seconds to Mars is great, until you realize how much time passes on Earth while you're shaving time off your trip.

SIX SEASONS AND… BUFFERING

Old commercials are the best, until you catch a block of them from 1988 on YouTube and realize you inexplicably remember a particular set of Perfect Strangers / Full House promos, but not tons of other vital information in your day-to-day life.

Being forced to watch The Big Bang theory on an endless loop until the end of time.

He finally got out of that damn puffy chair.

The "hypocrisy" conservatives get upset about is generally a figment of their own imagination and a consequence of their own lack of self awareness. They're perpetually the playground bullies running off to whine the moment someone says something mean.