You have a wife?  You must be quite the Cazenovia. 

ohhhhhhhhh look at Mr. Fancy pants big middle school gymnasium guy over here.

Stephen A Smith is the Ron Burgundy of sportscasting.  Somewhere there are writers practically choking on laughter “HE ACTUALLY SAID IT!”

“This is the game where Ryan Leaf finally delivers on the potential that the Chargers drafted him for!”

“Look. You just don’t bet against a team with Joe Montana at QB. You just don’t.”

How is Kissinger still alive?  Has the devil refused delivery?

Yeah I know this is gonna make me sound like A Old, but: When the revolution finally comes, Cheney* should be the first one against the wall as far as I’m concerned.

I don’t think that’ll happen as he probably won’t be allowed out for visits while in prison

KFC and cologne : (

Piss? and Dementia.

I’m almost as impressed by how good HRC is at looking like she didn’t notice their existence.

When I grow up I want to be Michelle Obama.

The subtlety is key. Poised, yet salty af. Yes Michelle. Serve. 

Fultz wanted some tips from a former Sixer, so he looked up some footage of Barkley... playing golf.

“Stanley died? Stanley who? The Cup guy?”

Goddamn snowflakes. Everybody knows a REAL man blames others for his own failures!

Hard to believe he emotionally and physically abused his wife.

Anyone wanna know all that I know about Tommy Boy?

Soory. No hosers or low ballers. I know what I got, Eh.