He may be simple, but you’re basic.

Waaaaaaaaaah. Let me into a Coen Brothers movie, or else I’ll call the ACLU! Waaaaaaaaaah.

Peeple is just democratizing Gawker.

It’s amazing how much content on this site is written for an audience that will never be hit on except at last call.

It’s actually a pretty cool t-shirt.

Why is it that every self-righteous shit-eating nematode retreats to shrieking “You’re a troll!” when the illegitimacy of their hare-brained arguments are laid bare? I’d like to know the psychology of the morally and logically retarded. Can anybody help?

I imagine that nauseating, smug, puritanical attitudes like yours kill more cows and baby pigs than all the advertising the meat industry has ever done, combined.

OK. And please ban cars, the common cold, and bad weather while you’re running around jabbing people with needles. You see, your stupid appeals to emotion don’t work on me, because reality has a well-known nihilistic bias.

Wait, do they make LooLoomuns for fatasses now?

That’s incorrect. Measles has never been a big killer, and wouldn’t be one now due to advancements in medical care. Sorry, buddy.

Jebus Christmas. 5200/ 52,000,000 is the fucking definition of insignificant.

Oh what a crock. I’m all for vaccinations, but the odds of dying from measles, mumps, rubella, or chickenpox are insignificant.

Probably the best way to get people to vaccinate would be to get liberals to shut the fuck up about trying to get people to vaccinate. The shrieking nanny-state stormtroopers can’t be very good for the cause.

Satanists are basically libertarians with cool costumes.

The bill will undoubtedly have a major economic impact on California’s women.

Which things? E-readers? Smartphones? Bluetooth vibrators?

““The fact that you feel upset about me speaking on something that affects black women makes me feel like you have some big balls.”

SO you are against black James Bond, right?

Tigerlily, like James Bond, is a fictional character. Race swapping is obviously AOK these days, because progress.

You don’t care *so much* that you had to respond to me!