Mrs. Trump is a strong and independent woman who has been navigating her role as First Lady in her own way.

He’s bitten the nuts off several men, so nope.

He’s military. 

I think this is fine but I don’t get the cultural obsession with being the first person on the plane. Why would I want to sit in the cramped, germ filled, smelly metal box for any longer than necessary?

I refuse to fly American until they let me bring my service animal with me. My pet crocodile even has his own red service jacket and everything.

This seems like a good idea.

It seems every year, airlines shrink the amount of legume I get on an airplane.

Maybe he means literally slept. Maybe he usually doesn’t sleep but just leaves? (and cosign with everyone else who apparently has slept with more people than John Mayer.)

If it makes you feel any better he was CRUCIFIED in the reader comments section of Guitar World for wearing this stupid neck pillow and sucking ass in general.

The one thing, I’ve realized as I’ve grown older is people are really getting tired of industry shit, and these industry games.

“50 Cent reportedly bought 200 tickets to a Ja Rule show so the seats would be empty”

Over it. Been over it. Really not in the mood to deal with two women tearing each other down. Literally have no patience for this b-s drama when there’s real, stressful shit going on all around us.

And I should follow my own advice, if you must know. 

Welp... now I will always sing Candle in the Wind with my newly acquired alternate lyrics.  Thanks (:

I had a Blade Runner Roy Batty monologue joke for this, but then I grossed myself out.

I hope so! And if not, I’ll fake a nosebleed and go home early.

Must have been hard for poor John to reach 500 when he had to exclude women of color. Can we just be done with him? He said his dick is “racist” and used the N-word while saying so. Hard pass, even if he wasn’t a major asshole.