I don’t think I want them quite that bad...

Here’s the thing though. If this law actually changed, no one would get sued more than Trump himself. He lies more any motherfucker on the planet. And every time he called CNN or NBC or the WAPO fake news on Twitter they could sue him for libel by simply providing the evidence they’ve already gathered for the stories…

It sure as fuck is...

Texas: You’re allowed to shoot someone who breaks into your house

Umm, if you don’t get accredited then you aren’t eligible to receive government funding. That’s kind of a big deal. So much so that losing accreditation is the equivalent of a death sentence. The same applies to individual programs. If your program teaches teachers, but NCATE says you’re not qualified to teach…

Oh I can identify them for you. The 10 years SACS review (with 5 year refresher) is the big one with a several hundred page document that requires every program, department, and office on campus be broken down in detail from mission statements to finance.

There is only one breakfast sandwich from McDonald’s that I sometimes get a craving for and it’s the steak, egg, and cheese bagel. Something about the grilled onions and pepper on the bagel really makes it and I don’t think it would work on an english muffin, so what you’re saying makes sense.

Southwest used to have best peanuts that I would absolutely buy now if they sold them in stores.

We must use towels differently. The skin on my ass is exactly the same as the skin on my face. I’m not using my towel as toilet paper...

Why? I just got out of the shower, my ass will never be cleaner.

I’m guessing you teach a liberal art and you’re comparing yourself to a STEM or BUS professor. We import our STEM professors from China and India because we can’t afford to pay market rate for American professors in those fields.

Your discretionary income according to the federal government is anything you make above 150% of the poverty line for your household (before taxes).

Looks like people are finally starting to listen to me.

A sizable chunk of the tuition increase is due to mandatory oversight regulations to make sure tuition money isn’t being wasted and all government rules are being followed.

The first option sounds really good...until you look into what discretionary income means to the federal government.  It’s not your income after your bills, it’s your income after the minimum amount of bills the government thinks you need to survive. 

If you put a burger dipper in a hotdog bun, are you eating a hotdog or a burger?

Lying on a warrant is a felony. Death resulting from the commission of a felony (in this case the execution of a falsely obtained warrant) is considered felony murder in the state of Texas.

Right...I was like what’s a coat? I literally haven’t worn a long sleeved thing in over a year. I think I have a couple of old hoodies but they’re in a bag in the crawlspace.

But the FAA investigation would do nothing to address weight distribution, it’s only looking at total weight based on averages. That all the bags in the front half of the plane are loaded with rocks and all the bags in the back half of the plane are loaded with exotic bird feathers doesn’t seem to be as important as…

Yeah, for 1 if it was a real serious issue, they’d weight each piece of luggage AND passengers.