Quick, someone tell me which side of the Civil War Iowa was on.

“soft skills—a friendly demeanor, punctuality—that their younger cohorts sometimes lack.”

Does that make these wine IUDs?

There’s so much stuff you can do if you’re cold, I don’t know how anyone stays cold.

net neutrality was going to be killed in the courts for FCC over-reach

The nostalgia was way better back in my day.  

I’m sorry your reptilian DNA prevents you from generating internal body heat, but if it’s not a layer issue, then the only way you’d be comfortable is if it was over 90 degrees, and I’d be dying of heatstroke because I’m a mammal and generate my own body heat.

Nah. This is Ajit Pai getting in on the ground floor of the call authentication company that he’s about to announce a legal requirement all telecom’s use (without regulating their price) (and he also happens to be majority stockholder of).

I’d rather your kid be obedient than think they get away with whatever they want.  If that takes spanking, so be it.

Unless there’s a layer of ice forming on the coffee you ordered 2 minutes ago, it’s not too cold. If you’re one of those people that’s always too cold, then wear more clothes. As one of those people who is always too hot, I would trade places with you in instant. You can always put on more clothes, but ‘society’ says…

Sure, let me just lay down on the low pile commercial carpet laid directly on concrete for a quick power nap. Because nothing says ‘refreshing’ like an aching back and sore neck for the rest of the day.

I thought about going to vote tomorrow, but then I was like nah, I got a lot of shit to do, and there are going to be lines, plus they might get mad if I try to vote again this election.

The voter realized there was a massive fault on the My Voter Page that could allow someone to individually change voter registrations.

Except the votes themselves are anonymous, so if someone pays me a million dollars to vote for Trump, I’ll happily tell them I’m voting for Trump, but when I’m alone in a booth, I’ll vote for whoever isn’t Trump.

Following the U.K. attempt to ban children from buying sports drinks

I always thought if George Soros was the evil genius the right made him out to be, he’d just pay a handful of people to live in Nebraska and Idaho so they could flip the votes there. Would probably be cheaper than paying all those protesters and internet commentators.

Because god forbid more than 40% of the eligible voters showed up.

Seeking asylum is LEGAL.

Clearly you haven’t seen the greatest campaign ad of all time.