You must live in a gated community.

Pan pizza inside the pillow case

Have you seen Ryan Howard? That guy is getting punched out all of the time!

That’s a compelling analysis.

does that say “drunk women”? ya know, just to clarify?

Whatever, Samer. At least they’re helping me get rid of my old Ed Hardy shirts too.

Author here. I’m a walking contradiction :/

this is going to be racist, isn’t it?

“Mine was worse.”

Retirement, Day 2: Having assaulted his way into the snow-matching white pool cover of his dreams, Tom Brady, area proletariat man, net worth a paltry $130 million, wearing donated clothing (the latest Tom Ford as well as custom black hightops in his size) regretfully turns low-income families away from his treatment…

Huh. Our pool cover is a forest green, but we never noticed how poorly it blends with the snow, because of how we can’t see it. Under the snow.

I originally created an avatar so it would be easier for my tired eyes to find my own comments.

Honestly? Shoe technology. Look at pictures of the guys who played in the 50’s and 60’s - they’re basically wearing work boots. It’s nearly impossible to punt in those, so you had guys kicking barefoot. Once soccer style cleats started catching on for kickers and punters, there wasn't any need to kick barefoot anymore.

No idea. If it helps, I THINK it was a US Bank food drive thing in 2010 or 2011.

Don't act like you've never been there.

I remember that! The Duchennes one in San Diego I believe. Had a great time there.

He was actually complaining about the Junk Food Friday meal (totally separate from Pregame meal and Night Before Snack meal).

I'm actually thinking of pitching that to Deadspin as a piece. Will It Punt?!

It's both, and they are delicious

i don’t get all these skee lo comments the guy went 0 for 4 he didn’t have a hit single