I’m pretty sure the best thing about Donald Trump is his inability to think up any insult besides “loser” and “lightweight” unless he’s going after how someone looks, and even then, I think I’ve met 5 year olds who are more creative. He’s just such an utter moron, it’s ridiculous.

I mean, it could be because there’s no such thing as a toy for a boy and a toy for a girl? When I was a kid, I had a Star Wars action figure collection that put any of my brother’s friend’s to shame and my brother had an Ariel barbie doll he couldn’t leave the house without. I also had Barbies and American Girl dolls…

How do these people internet if the word “fuck” is that scary? I don’t... ok.

This is such a good point. I’m childless but, when talking to my husband about names for potential future kids, I’m always fighting for either a super classical name (like Thisbe) for a girl that may not be gendered right off the bat, or a name that can have a uni-sex or masculine nick name, just because I know it…

Yeah, no, I’m sure Darren Wilson and his idiot wife were the two people in that office who weren’t racists. I mean just about everyone else who was in power in that town were sending racist emails back and forth and telling horrible jokes and all around horrible people, but I’m sure the guy who killed a black teenager…

Holy cow does she look like her mother! Wow!

Yeah, that’s just NYT style. It’s different than AP style. They also do a different headline style and whatnot (most words capitalized instead of just first word and proper nouns.)

That gif is a goddamn masterpiece.

No lie, I ask my friend who works at Starbucks any time I want to deviate from my usual order (which I also asked about) to make sure that what I want won’t be annoying to make. I’ve never worked in a coffee place but I’ve worked in restaurants and dear god I do not want to be one of those people.

God, motherfucker even looks like a Disney villain. Poor lion wandered around for 40 hours after being shot by this asshole, too. It’d be some nice, karmic justice if he’d get shot in the leg and have to limp his way to the hospital, only to get run over by an ambulance on his way in.

Molly Ivins is so amazing. Reading some of what she’s said on abortion rights makes me almost happy cry. My mom met her once in an elevator at the newspaper where they both worked for a while. She couldn’t get an autograph because she was too busy gaping open mouthed at the awesomeness before her. Can’t say I blame…

Rich people need to just give their money to me. I’d spend it better.

Sentient mass of shower drain hair? Anthropomorphic turd that came to life using some demonic form of the magic that brought Frosty the Snowman to life? Human host to the alien from planet Toupee?

Given that Star Trek takes place in a rather Utopian future in which Earth no longer has money, individual countries or religion, I don’t think Republicans would be all that happy there... Not to mention the mission of the Federation and its egalitarian attitudes.

I got these little labels that you put into cheeses with my cheese and crackers tray that I got at my bridal shower. You write on them in dry-erase marker so people can tell what the cheese is and, while I’ve used the cheese and cracker tray, I have yet to use the little flag thingies. But they’re so adorable (and a…

Good luck girl, cause wedding food is fucking expensive and like 60% of the time sucks. We looked at one place that would charge us 70 bucks a head for everyone, including kids under 12 (of whom we had like 10 coming and several of them we knew would only eat, like, a roll and that’s it), and we couldn’t even try the…

Bell’s Oberon is my life’s blood. I literally check to see if it’s sold in the state/city I’m moving to before accepting a new job. Not joking. Fucking magical. Also delicious and from Michigan? Arbor Brewing Company’s Strawberry Blonde. Shit is beautiful.

“How should I start my interview with a notoriously intelligent liberal woman on a notoriously liberal TV network as a conservative? I know, interrupting her as she introduces me and then explain my total misunderstanding of the judicial branch of government sounds PERFECT. I’m so smart, I win at politics.” - Rick…

My husband didn’t read all the books (just the first one when he burned through all the books he brought on a trip and that one was on my Kindle) but he has an ominous feeling about the last movie thanks to me saying repeatedly “OH GOD ALL I’M GOING TO DO FOR THE LAST HUNGER GAMES IS SOB.” Prim is going to turn me…

I know stealing is wrong, I’ve never stolen anything in my life (not even a pack of gum or 10 bucks from my mom’s purse - thanks Catholic guilt!) but my husband is a manager at Kohl’s and the one he works at recently moved locations, including all their fixturing, and in the process, found some jewelry that had fallen…