What about telling them before you have the affair and let them decide if that’s okay for them. Hell, ask them if they want to explore swinging, but at least give them a chance to make a decision before you go it unilaterally.

No problem. You don’t want monogamy, ask your wife if she’s into exploring swinging. If she isn’t, decide if that relationship’s worth it and make a decision.

Agree 100%. Was in the lifestyle for years and now choose monogamy. Swinging was cool at the time but ultimately not what I was emotionally looking for. Became monogamous in my 40’s and am much more emotionally fulfilled this way, even if a bit frustrated every blue moon. But nothing I can’t put up with for all the…

Agree 100%. Swinging is just fine. This isn’t swinging by a mile, but betrayal. Man willing to risk hurting his wife by having an affair should man up and ask her if she’s up for exploring non-monogamy. Give her the opportunity to do the same, very least.