So the pregnant woman lost the fetus at its own party? Ughhhhghsgsvduf.

“Ohio is an open-carry state that allows residents to openly possess firearms with or without a license.”

That second one made me actually laugh out loud. I was having breakfast with my one-year-old while reading, so he laughed too (because mommy was laughing). Now we’re both going to hell, so thanks for that.

It was a long first date, and that happened near the end of it. He was kind of spacy to begin with, but a genuinely good person; it really hadn’t occurred to him at that moment that the cat and I shared a first name, or that I didn’t know about the cat. 

And Barron!

LOL my neighbors name is Guy.

perfect

What else are you supposed to name a kid who will be hanging around with Saint?

I’ve never gone viral, but I did have my Tumblr (Preciouser Moments) hit with a cease and desist from the people at Precious Memories. Turns out they don’t like their figurines being altered digitally.

Also, if you look at someone else’s wedding photo, and your first thought is “consummation,” you are the freak.

How can anyone hate on a confetti-themed wedding? That is happiness itself.

Be safe in the knowledge that the sort of folks who randomly attack the happiness of others when it has zero impact on their own lives have already suffered enough: they’ve likely spent an angry lifetime barking and screeching at everything, and are likely profoundly broken and filled with sadness. Pity them.

The only sane reason why this marriage maybe shouldn’t have been allowed is because that’s too much gorgeous for one couple. Leave some for the rest of us dammit.

All that’s missing is Hollywood Upstairs Medical College.

People are using essential oils for things other than scent?

Does she have a supplement to address why my eyes close involuntarily around 12 AM - 1 AM in the morning? Because that’s annoying.

I think her best response would have been, “Kim and I had another confrontation at game night and it left me angry with Kim and also convinced she is not sober, which I know you don’t agree with. I am sorry Kyle for upsetting you but every interaction I have with Kim is negative and Eden is my friend so I vented to…