damn SJW snowflakes. Always upsetting our delicate white male feelings

Easy joke about Republicans wanting kids in their bed. yada yada yada

I just want DOOM and DOOM II

Random question. What about talking to women you’re stuck in a slow moving elevator with who are clearly terrified of you? I really wish I could say something like “I’m sorry men suck but I promise I’m going to leave you alone.” Same at the gym.

Usually I just keep my head down and try to make it obvious that I’m…

Doc forgot to mention the finger guns. ALWAYS approach with finger guns. Women love it. If you blow pretend smoke away from the barrels she’ll probably just jump you then and there

This sounds like one of those addictions I don’t have because I can’t afford to. How does anybody have $10,000 by the time they’re 19? I mean I get that it was nickel and dimed out of him over 6 years but still, spending $10,000 on anything at that age seems impossible to me

I’m just not bothered by it. This isn’t the same as people being creepy about the kids from Stranger Things, it’s a drawing. It doesn’t have an age. It can’t be victimized because it doesn’t really exist. I’m going to save my outrage for actual living people

its so meta!

I think that’s why Patreon is a thing now. Just easier to panhandle than come up with a phony grand project

Tried to crowdfund my vasectomy once. Didn’t raise much money. Guess I need to be a bigger dick to people so they wont want me to reproduce

That’s what an introvert being thrown on the main stage looks like. I make the same face when somebody tells the waitstaff that it’s my birthday. Then again she’s a terrible person and this is karma just vomiting into her lap so it makes me laugh

hope you never have kids

Welcome to Jezebel, where domestic abuse is only serious if the victim is a woman. Sure she was arrested for battery in front of an infant, but her MALE EX IS THE REAL VILLAIN!

Rewrite this terrible article

Edit: Waiting for the incoming comments on how I’m a troll because I think domestic violence should be taken…

I’m starting to support the death of the internet. It’s made us all crazy and the vast majority of it is evil and filled with revenge porn and swastikas.

Now obviously we’re talking about ISPs getting a say in who gets what for how much, and that’s inherently wrong. I won’t support that and I’ll sign petitions. Still,…

If Mel doesn’t get bombarded with accusations I’ll be shocked. There’s no way that man hasn’t done some terrible shit

Stop filling that kid’s head with nonsensical stats and get her ass to NASA quick! We need all the smart people we can get at this point. My generation wasted ours

Frustrating, infuriating, mind-numbing, all of these are better than “addictive”

its sucked then and it sucks now

I hated getting that 100 jump moon so I’m glad they glitched it. Take that bastard programmer for putting a rythm jumping mini game in a mario game.

Only way I finally got that moon was using the scooter trick

Good to know theres a workaround for all of this troubling “men facing consequences” business. I can get back to groping if enough women agree that I don’t do it. I’ll have to limit my targets to WOC only though, otherwise people might do something drastic like believe the victim