Also worth noting: nearly a year's experience at this has taught me that if I respond to all criticism (regardless of whether it's well-intentioned and sane, as yours is here) as gently and reasonably as possible, the whole situation turns into blood in the water faster than I can blink. Coming out strong is often a…

Restaurant workers messing with a complete asshole's food is kind of like capital punishment. There are many of us who don't support it and think it's a barbaric thing to do, but there are times when it happens to someone that you just can't feel even a little bit sorry for.

I remember working at McDonald's and we had a rather rude usual who would complain just to complain. He was pretty young, probably 15 or 16, just being a redneck douche (this was in a small rural Georgia town, the kind where the only liquor licenses in town were held by churches). One day, he brings back his Double…

I knew someone who worked in a hotel who was thrown a dollar bill after an extremely unpleasant guest interaction, and she too ripped it up in the customer's face.

Like FreshlyShaven said, if you can't afford to pay a tip then don't go out. It's that simple. I'm broke as fuck and because of that I make my own food instead of going out.

If you earned $2,000 for your last pay period, and you got a check for $20, would you confront your boss and/or payroll department about it?

Who the fuck are you to decide where and how this person gets to spend their "welfare money"? Do you even know why he was on assistance? Like maybe he is a vet or disabled or mentally ill - none of which is any of your self-righteous, dim-witted, shit for brains business.

I don't enjoy stories about messing with assholes' food as much mainly because I want the assholes to be aware that they've been burned and in such a way that they can't prove that the person who burned them did it. If they walk out of the story and don't know that what they did had consequences, then I'm not…

Just to let you know, I earmarked my tax money to pay for this particular guy's pizza, so lay the fuck off. It's paid for, we got it covered.

Rarely do I use "messing with food" stories — most of them aren't very entertaining. That one, both "my chicken BALLS" and the wink — especially the wink — made it wonderful for me.

The upside is that, if anyone has ever deserved a shitty tip, it's you!

Yeah, I'm just sitting here waiting for the inevitable wave of "omg you can't EVER mess with the food of a spiteful asshole who is seriously hurting your ability to make a living wage, obviously his chicken being un-balled is far more important than you being able to pay your rent" posters to charge in here. I think…

Those ungrateful Poors. Obviously wasting money they clearly don't deserve.

Never, ever, EVER come to America.

Based on the number of commenters who are ABSOLUTELY APPALLED that any server would mess with a person's food for ANY reason, that is ASSAULT and it is NEVER JUSTIFIED and LOTS OF OTHER WORDS IN CAPITAL LETTERS and other HORSESHIT, I'm going to assume a lot of people think no one would ever do this. Lol. OK.

I had a co-worker receive a tip in pennies, maybe 25 cents worth, from a table of annoying, bratty young-ish women. He chased them out of the restaurant, throwing the pennies at them. I was surprised he didn't get fired. Happy for him, but surprised.

I'm actually not a fan of the "extremely friendly" server. I won't deduct from the tip for it, because I don't want them to be punished for my tastes, but beyond refills, answering what few questions I might have, and making sure the food comes out on a timely basis, I really don't want to interact with anyone other…

It's the "winking back" that won it for me. Balls to the wall.

"As a palate cleanser for the last two weeks, please enjoy some stories of terrible customers receiving their just rewards."

They're likely the same people who think telling women in public they're "prettier when they smile" is an act of civil nobility.