This is the thing; most people are conditioned from childhood not to be rude to assholes. Fuck that noise.

“I know dear.”

Liquorice is black. If it’s not black, it’s not liquorice. (Mind you, if it’s not sweet, it’s not candy - looking at you, salted liquorice.)

“defaming the Dutch and their probably delicious candy.”

Wow. What a turd.

I’m Australian, & IMO, the standard of service I receive at restaurants is excellent.

“but occasionally I like to punish.”

“to make sure that the busboy does not prematurely remove the plates”

It’s amazing how much bullshit drivers will make up to excuse being assholes on the road. You seem like the kind of guy who punches people in the face for “looking at you funny”.

[Video of a driver swerving into a biker] “I don’t see that he swerved “at” anything at all.”

You really should. I’m tempted to make one up myself.

Give it a try! (And add a little sesame oil to the oil in your wok. :)

Just so you know, if you cut broccoli stems on a diagonal & stir fry them, they are delicious. Ditto for cauliflower & many other veggies.

“overly cooked vegetables, broccoli and brussel sprouts are horrible.”

“Nuggets de la Pollo”

Meh. As far as I’m concerned, kids like that can go hungry if they don’t want to eat what everyone else is eating.

He might be right - he certainly looks like he could be related to chicken nuggets.

I hear the word ‘dip’ & assume something sour-cream based, or possibly something Middle-Eastern, like hummus, etc. Not salsa, although calling it a dip isn’t a huge stretch, I guess.

“This coffee tastes too FRESH!”

“The wife starts a tirade about how there is a federal age limit for who can be a manager”