As a kid, I sat on a newly-upholstered piano stool and got a staple in my ass. Still have the scar.

I want to like him but can't because he gave away her elderly cat over Twitter. Douche.

We had our cat allergy tested. Shit's expensive! But worth it if we can improve his quality of life. He's allergic to feathers, we discovered, among other things. Vet tried to sell us on allergy shots but we're trying to control the allergies and skin problems with food and air filters first since he's young. So…

Good for him! When you adopt an animal, you take full responsibility for that creature's well-being. You'd let your kid have surgery if it was needed, so why not your best furry (or gilled) friend?

My SIL had a baby New Year's party. They rang in 2015 at 5pm so all the tiny ones could be home for 7pm beddy-bye. Sounds good to me!

Aw, man. Best narrator ever! RIP.

I don't understand why someone would want to conceal carry a handgun. They're so temperamental. If you REALLY were worried about safety, why not buy a taser? Pepper spray? (I know they're not legal everywhere, but at least they're non-lethal.) I'm against having handgun in the home, but I do enjoy trap shooting.

There's a big difference between people who follow some bullshit Paleo or Atkins diet and those of us who suffer from Selective Eating Disorder/ARFID. Yes, it's a real thing, and no, we're not picky just to be an asshole. I don't expect to be accomodated, but I'd be super insulted if someone asked me to not join a…

You would have to drug me so much to get me back on that plane.

Kalle is a man's name, not a woman's, FYI.

I imagine "Dewitos" tastes like a Mountain Dew/Doritos burp.

Port Authority Bus Terminal : Myth Meth, Mystery, Misery, Mess

Would you rather think about Duggar-Tebow sex or Wilkinson-Hefner sex?

So, seals are the Jeffrey Dahmers of the animal kingdom.

So, seals are the Jeffrey Dahmers of the animal kingdom.

I'm too much of a softy to volunteer. I have a hard time walking past the pet supply store and seeing their adoptable animals in the window! So, I donate stuff and money. It's the best I can manage without destroying my heart :)

It makes me sad, too. Very sad. So I donate to rescue organizations to soothe my soul a bit.

Oy.. It's one thing to be a farmer slaughtering animals as per usual, but to buy tickets to an event to see it happen? That's just...blood lust.

Oh! The poor dears! While I totally empathize with the desire to SAVE ALL TEH KITTEHS, hording is not the way to do it. I hope they all find wonderful, loving homes! And that the van owner gets the help she needs.

A JoAnn's Fabrics and Michaels in the same shopping center? *heaven*