I was just starting out in politics 20 years ago, and I had this advisor that looked just like Katherine Harris, the Florida AG of Gore v. Bush fame. My advisor was a staunch Republican (formero GOP adviser) on a very liberal campus, and she always looked like she just ate a lemon.

My mother reminding me that no matter how much money someone “seems to have” they may have nothing and be up to their eyeballs in debt. I grew up in Bloomfield Hills MI. Huge homes, no furniture, but their kids always had the good clothes and cars.

I’m not so sure. We had an open bar, top shelf, at our wedding reception. We paid for 80 people for 4 hours.

It really feels like “put it all in your mouth at once” is the absolute worst way to enjoy good whiskey.  I mean, other than putting it in your butt.

Punishment for the vapist will be to hold their vape in their teeth, sticking out, while a waiter knocks it out of their mouth with the swing of a service tray.  

I am a non-tobacco smoker, and I do not enjoy secondhand cigarette smoke or vaping fumes. That said, I would much rather be sitting near someone vaping than smoking a cigarette. It smells much, much worse. 

I’m here to help change that for you! I HAVE FAITH IN YOU SO GET CONFIDENT, STUPID. 

I am not a baker, but I am Italian. I can easily lose any aggression and several hours to prepping sauce and wailing classic Dean Martin on a weekend morning.

That belongs in a museum! on a pillow!

as a manager in fast food, whenever I’m told someone wants to talk to a manager I brace myself for the worst, its such a relief and really makes my day when its actually a positive comment about me or one of my coworkers

I used to be a Starbucks store manager, and you wouldn’t believe the petty shit people would take the time to complain about us to corporate. One time I was expediting the people in line and this lady  made a gesture that would suggest a large coffee, but said “tall coffee.” I asked if she meant the large size or the…

I do this, too, and it is both funny and sad how they often react to asking if a manager is available. I got great service at a Best Buy, and when I was done, I asked the woman helping me if there was a manager that I could speak with. Her face fell, as she thought she had done a good job and assumed that me wanting…

I love random acts of kindness! On the same note, the title crafted for this post is excellent.

If I get really good service at a restaurant of any kind I will ask to speak to a manager. They are usually so surprised when i share something positive. I always make sure to add that they should keep this in mind during that employee’s next review. 

In middle school a friend had the brilliant idea to just bring in a whole thing of canned frosting and eat it with a spoon throughout the day, and apparently that’s a great way to never want frosting again.

I am 34 now, and happily married.

I faked a panic attack so I wouldn’t have to go to soccer practice and David Beckham just happened to be swinging by to coach that day. I cried for days when I found out afterwards. Got to see him weeks later, but it was just like a “hello children” waving as he walks by kinda thing. I never faked sick again.

I stopped at Trader Joe’s and got a bag of dried apples while on the way to a train station. I ate the entire bag during the first 5 minutes of a 3-hour train ride. I had no idea. I am not sure which was worse: the constant pooping or the gas pains sitting in my seat.

Once in middle school I ate an entire bag of dried apricots. My mom was upset with me when she found out, but I thought she was just mad because I had hogged all of it. Twenty minutes later I learned the truth of the matter. No matter all the inspirational memes and quotes about living a life with no regrets, I’ll…

My husband and I went on a honeymoon cruise, and one night the entertainment was a Newlywed Game style audience participation show where they picked a newlywed couple from the audience, a couple that had been married the longest, and a couple in between to participate as contestants. We were the newlywed couple. In…