nobody-in-particular
Nobody in Particular
nobody-in-particular
Oct 21
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I think it just makes him America’s favorite colonel. He’s certainly Savage Nobody’s favorite Colonel. In fact, he and Savage Nobody go way back. He and I were a working on the railroad* back during the Great Depression. Read more

Oct 21
1

Normally I’d say it was wrong, but given Trump’s previous successes, I’m starting to think America might be a masochist who gets off on the thought of a boot pressing on its face forever.

Oct 21
4

I, personally, am a big fan of the Gay Army Against Clowns series. I recommend the second installment; it really expanded on the first one, but doesn’t feel like it’s trying to do too many different things like the third.

Oct 21
8

It’s time for Savage Nobody! The advice column that’s running fashionably late today! Because he forgot it was Wednesday! For a very important reason! Because he was too busy playing videogames to even spend 5 seconds glancing at the date! But anyway, he’s here now and he promises to make it up to all of you, with Read more

Oct 14
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Whatever website you want to use is fine. As long as your not long dong is traveling through the information highway causing crashes on computers with too many porn tabs open, you are doing The Lord’s work. And by “The Lord,” I mean Savage Nobody.

Oct 14
2

Indeed. And that’s just the letter writer’s husband. You’ll have to get into the thousands in order to compete with Savage Nobody and Mike Pence.

Oct 14
5

Savage Nobody isn’t Death, but is probably responsible for more loss of life, so consider him qualified to answer this question. In his 1st grade class play about the founding of America, Savage Nobody played Squanto and taught the pilgrims (and the audience) about how to bury a fish with your corn in order to help it Read more

Oct 7
9

Don’t. Let her think you’re a truck. She’ll want to continue dating you because of your ability to transport large objects across considerable distances. Compare that to normal human you; one option is clearly superior.

Sep 30
3

First, let me say that you have good taste in choosing hydrangeas. Second, know that you shouldn’t worry; plants really love it when you wet them. Nothing gets them in the mood quite like regular wetting. Finally let me say that you never have just one chance for polybotanamary

Sep 30
6

Sure, one guy’s incompetence led to 200,000 people dying from a contagious virus that most definitely can’t be cured by bleach, and the other guy has stressed the danger of that virus and the importance of wearing a mask, but if you remove the 2 from 200,000 you get 00,000. That mean’s they’re practically the same!

Sep 30
8

When in doubt, I recommend avoiding crazy guys who condone white supremacists and have over a dozen rape accusations against them. But that’s just me. Since I am technically a media personality and am therefore obligated to give equal attention to both sides for some reason even though one is vastly worse than the Read more