A friend is someone who supports you when someone attacks you. It is not immature of you to expect that. It is immature of them not to realize that. They are pussies and you are better off without them.

It doesn't change. I hate to say this, but your friends will find this out if they have daughters. It sickens me to say that, but it's true.

I am with you totally. I am a massive side-taker. Oh, not if it's over something silly (she never returned my shoes! Yes, I did!). But something like this? If I believed that my friend was sexually harassed, nothing could stop me from attacking the harasser.

I used to tell my students — you all think you are too fat/thin, have terrible skin, and you hate your hair and your noses — right? They would literally GASP! "Miss, are you psychic?" they would say. I would say, "No. I was once a teenager, too, when dinosaurs roamed Brooklyn. You are all gorgeous. Enjoy it."

I don't buy it because it hasn't happened to me and I am in my 40s. When I got divorced at 42, my first lover, who chased me desperately, was a soldier — 23 years old, washboard abs — he looked like he was carved out of marble, he was so perfect. And, as I said, he was 23. I dated lots of guys in their 20s and 30s.…

Invisible? Ridiculous. This is my favorite answer to that — Carmen Dell Orefice — modeling since she was 15. She is 83, sitting here with Kanye, and still modeling.

I've got a name for you. Carmen Dell Orefice. She is 83. She is many things — invisible not being one of them. Cougar? Crone? Desperate? YOU may feel that way — but she is 83 and she doesn't. Yes, she has always been beautiful but she is proof that you can keep it. I saw her once, walking down Park Avenue and…

When my dad was on his deathbed — literally his deathbed — the nurses washing him (I overheard them) were saying, "Look how young he looks! He could be twenty years younger than he is! It's amazing. What a handsome man." Devastated as I was, I had to smile — my whole life I heard how gorgeous my dad was — now I was…

I am sorry to tell you your mother was wrong. What kind of woman tells her child she will never have beauty? A messed-up woman. You had beauty then and you have it now and you can tell her I said that. Damn, I am pissed at your mom right now. She was wrong on so many levels.

You're silly. It's not how you look. It's how you look at it. I had the amazing fortune to be raised by women who never, ever thought age would stop them or their beauty, and it didn't. My grandma married for the last time — to yet ANOTHER rich man — when she was in her seventies. Her seventies. Yes, we look…

Whatever this means — you look younger than your age — this means. My whole family looks younger than we are. Some of us are in great shape, others flabby, but we all look younger than we are. Men and women. The funniest things that happened ever with this was when my dad went to a meeting of Korean War Vets. He…

I wondered the same thing, since I visit a friend who is serving 23 to life for 2nd degree murder. I am a liberal. I had no idea that I couldn't, as a liberal, have compassion for those in the criminal justice system. Thank goodness Bananas Lady told me how I feel. I had no idea.

Really? Thank G-d you told me that! I am a left wing liberal and I visit a friend who is swerving 23 to life for 2nd degree murder. I have been written letters both time he has been up for parole, trying to get him out. I have spent a whole bunch of my own money and time visiting him, sending him food, cigarettes,…

Well done. I have always loved that name!

Some people would disagree with you but trust me — I can't imagine a woman who would be remotely interested in anything like that.

Singing works really well. The alphabet song. Twinkle, twinkle little star. It works like a charm.

I am looking at this picture and all I see is a beautiful family. The Disneyland employee who insulted that lovely woman needs to be re-trained or fired. I don't hold with people losing their jobs if they can be re-trained, so I hope that happens.

I don't wear make-up because I don't think it looks good on me. Simple.

They don't look alike, but both are fiiiiiiiiine as hell.

There are academics who surmise that he was mixed. He was from Liverpool — home of many mixed prostitutes — and he might have been the illegitimate son of Cathy's father, so, yeah — mixed. And incest. And all this great Victorian shit.