Man, it’s bleak here today. We’re getting shit-talked by fucking Rhode Islanders. It’s like a turd making fun of diarrhea.

Haha, yeah. I went back to my college for homecoming once maybe 4-5 years after I graduated and swung by my old frathouse. It was fine, everybody was cool and welcoming. But I immediately felt my age. I decided then and there I would never be back.

Lol being in a frat in college was a lot of fun and all but the people who stay involved like that beyond college to be Professional Fraternity Dudes (because let’s be real the people this committed are the ones who scold you for saying frat, iT’s FrAtErNiTy) basically chose the “middle school student council” of…

It also looks like there’s chocolate syrup dried in there.

This is not a Santa beard. This is the look of a homeless man who was taken off the streets and cleaned up to stand behind the city council while they have a press conference extolling the virtues of their “labor-for-soup” program.

See I would have come up with two other words; Red State. 

Indianapolis is also home to SEVERAL fraternity and sorority national HQs, meaning that city is home to many professional frat guys

It’s ok, Indiana will pull itself up by its bootstraps any decade now. Republican-style!!!

but as long as minorities are worse off and their reps are praisin’ Jaysus these idiots don’t care that their state is dying. 

I’ve gone through Indiana a couple times. Every time I do I look around at the landscape, the abandoned buildings, the disrepair, and the same two words come to mind:

You have 3 buildings that meet the measurements required to be labeled a skyscraper.  I researched this to make sure of the accuracy, because last time I drove through I thought I saw 4 tall buildings, but only 3 are big boys.  

Damn it, Jerry!

Having this come out right after Luck’s announcement is cruel and unusual punishment.

About 98% of us hate the 2% that booed him. They can fuck off to Philly or something.  But sir, we have AT LEAST...*looks around and counts*...5 tall buildings downtown. We’re not Akron, or something.

Great job updating the WYTS entry with the late breaking news, Drew.

As much as I want Jacoby to succeed ( former Patriots QB, after all ), seeing those tweets has made me believe that Indiana has already ruined him, and by the end of the season he’ll be the league’s first QB with Alzheimer’s. 

Indiana is full of hateful racist backwoods losers yet somehow produced Kurt Vonnegut. It’s like his very existence used up the states entire allotment of decency for all eternity. 

The residents of this 3 building having, 4 block fucking town screamed and booed at someone who, until that point, seemed to be one of the least booable people in the entire league. The guy that was set up to be hurt by men who were unqualified to build a team around him. It’s a shame and a relief that it came to this.

It’s like he timed it just for this. 

Andrew Luck 2012: *Takes a sack* Great job, man. Insane hustle. You really got me.

Andrew Luck 2019: You even just look at the ceiling and wish you could stop existing? Like, not die, but just POOF and cease being altogether. Maybe it’s nothing but motionless, soundless black. Complete emptiness. Nothingness. But it’s…