Sometimes there's a man…

Maybe something like this? http://imgc-cn.artprintimag…

And a top-notch pastry chef.

Will it work on children, though?

It's really not so much the oranges that we have to worry about, it's the grapefruit. They're coming for us.

"Potential" supervillain? This is a guy with an accent and a laser. Sure, it right now it may only be at balloon-popping capacity, but by Christmas he'll be taking over Nakatomi Plaza. "Now I have a laser blaster. Ho, ho, ho." (Yes, I know that's backwards. Shut up.) Are we going to wait until he starts blowing up…

Yow! So, the Rodian penis must be pretty much like an armored car.

This is fantastic! Such a great response, even if it does offend my sincerely-held belief that the definition of a traditional marriage is a union between one me and one Natalie Portman.

Don't you even start with me…

We are legion!

Or maybe sell them to the gypsies.

That. Is. Awesome. +1000

I hate you.

On Friday I watched five minutes of an episode of My Little Pony that I had already seen eight times in the preceding 24 hours because my five-year-old had the Roku remote. I also listened to a Colombian children's song called La Vaca Lola 147 times in a row until the battery ran out on my two-year-old's tablet. I saw…

Wow, that's a lot! You don't have kids, do you?

It makes sense if you haven't seen the end of Gettysburg yet. Now shut up before you ruin it for me!

Some men just want to watch the world burn.

Well, if you have to ask…

Don't forget whales humping, see-man Beaumont.

A tense submarine thriller featuring Cold War enemies and a renegade captain?
Wait, are we having the 90's again?