Are there any other cons like that you used/were used on you by siblings or your kids?

Last Tango in the Epcot France Pavillion

Does anyone know how to become a contestant on Shark Tank?

I believe I can speak for all of us when I say, “Fuck Church Groups”

Hot dog in a baked potato topped with bacon bits, chives, and sour cream

We need yelp reviews of Christian haunted houses. There was one at the Mormon Church when I was a godless teen living down the street. You better believe the dangers of smoking were included.

But she likes that.

Someone go slap E.L. James please and thanks.

Funny thing is (except no it’s not funny) that he actually says the server works for him, not the restaurant. Which means he’s accepting responsibilty for their pay. Which means he feels fully justified in stiffing anybody who works for him. I would love to see how that works out the next time he hires a plumber.

“but occasionally I like to punish.”

Screw that, a wasp. No, several wasps, several wasps who don’t like each other and decide to settle their difference with a winner-take-all “Who can sting this guy in the dick the most times.” contest.

I’ve waited on hundreds of richardcohens in my life. This is the guy who announces at the beginning of the meal that he controls your tip, and you’d better measure up. He says it in a jokey way, so that his friends laugh - but you and he know better. He then spends the next 3 hours running you ragged. He wants a…

...wrinkly old man penis sex games.

What the bullshit is this horseshit? I like to punish????? Dude, there’s professional clubs you can go to for that, your server isn’t interested in your wrinkly old man penis sex games.

“Look, I can make the natives scurry if I toss some coins at them! I AM A GOLDEN GOD!”

My wife works now as a pediatric neurologist. A few (or maybe more than a few at this point) years back, she was waiting tables. She attended to both with the same care, as a professional does, taking pride in one’s work and doing one’s utmost to be the best one can be. The whiff of “these little people are beneath me…

The density of stupid in that column is amazing.

“Sometimes I like to punish.”

“I hesitate to mention another reason I like tipping. I like to make a difference, not just to be a bit of a big shot or be noticed or appreciated, but to give some of what I make to those who make less. I’m not flipping silver dollars into the air or hurling twenties around with abandon, but I am a healthy tipper…