I've got this one: when someone gets a hit.

This is the weirdest humblebrag.

They were going to put the Constitution on the jerseys, but there was a First Amendment problem.

I'm sorry, but I have to wholeheartedly disagree with this article. I am supposed to stop supporting a team I grew up loving because the asshole higher ups made and a completely terrible decision? I have to choose between being a feminist and supporting a team whose fan ship is huge part of my identity? Of course Ray…

Okay, after 31 teams, I need to say it: We get it. Every single fanbase has terrible, terrible fans. I love Drew's write-ups but 75% of the reader write-ins are exactly the same for every team.

They didn't. They reported it as dyes, not dies. The joke is that people with run with any rumor without checking the source or knowing English.

Going to bed at this hour? Do I need to get off your lawn?

Lower the mound and stop allowing pitchers to use pine tar/other sticky agents.

ahh, the old "this doesn't fix ALL our problems so let's not even try" argument. Pass.

All the other drivers leave Danica behind, I wouldn't worry about it.

The red delicious would have been the lowest fruit on the list if Kyle Wagner hadn't given it a 10, which is the worst judgment a human being has ever exhibited.

We didn't include things that are fruit in the, like, horticultural or botanical sense or whatever, but that tend not to be eaten in a fruit-like manner.

You didn't include things not eaten in a fruit-like manner, but there are lemon and lime stealing spots in the top 10.

Jesus, pineapple?! The fuck is wrong with you guys! Put raspberry back at the top where it belongs.

Mistake #1: NASCAR doesn't have this many fans.

the militarization of Gawker.

The fans simply felt Nathan had been hot-dogging it.

The fans simply felt Nathan had been hot-dogging it.

"I saw a deaf, dumb and blind kid playing pinball this morning. It reminded me of that song by The Who, 'Magic Bus'."

American Pie... cool reference bro