oh hey, you’re me! I get the option of driving three hours to the airport, or driving fourteen hours through the inevitable snowstorm, to drink wine and watch movies and have my mom passive-aggressively huff every time I visit my dad.
I can’t travel this year because of work. It is THE BEST. We’re opening presents via…

About 10-15% of my students are indigenous, and about a third of those grew up on reservations. They’d probably have better names for the streets...

This, so so hard. I’m coming up on 36, married no kids. I live a fourteen-hour drive north of my parents in *good* weather... it once took me 21 hours straight through alone on icy roads. =/ I feel really guilty being way up here since my stepdad died and my mom’s alone, but I am actually relieved to have work-related…

holy shit dude. That is messed up.

Was it the Slap Chop? Because I legit want one just because of the infomercial.

Not so much anymore, no. The US-grown stuff is usually higher quality because it doesn’t have to be bricked, and Americans love their fancy local microbrew strains. Cartels are switching over to cocaine and heroin. Both of those markets are expanding... heroin to numb the hopelessness, and cocaine to fuel the asshole…

Yes, please! Give me your kilometers and your colours!
I’m in Minnesota; we’re practically Canada already but I will gladly take Canadian lessons.

Questions are for SJW cucks.

Oh, sure. She’s pretty standard-issue “lady I try to avoid in the checkout line,” now with a national audience.

Indeed. Ivanka is clearly the First Lady; we can leave Melania alone.

It was one of those foam-sword gladiator matches college kids have. And someone brought an arm-length dildo to a foam fight.

I did once see a guy whapped in the head with a Thor dildo. He had to get treated for a concussion.

Do you think clubbing would be visible on those tiny fingers?

My snot froze inside my nose on the walk to work today. Windchill -22F. Hooray Minnesota.

Why would I want to buy a whole pig when I can get free sausage whenever I want? Win-win.

If only I had a thousand stars to give. Puritan capitalism taints everything.

This is why: http://the-orbit.net/brutereason/2016/12/10/yes-fail-empathize-conservatives/
(keep reading past the headline)

This. I may be going into premature ovarian failure (menopause at 35, yippee!), and am on some medications to help speed up this baby-makin’ process. But I’m seriously ready to throw up my hands and say fuck it. Nine months as an incubator under a Pence VP-ship and then bringing a child into a world on fire from…

Just bought a house in Minnesota. Can confirm.

UPenn, not Penn State. We’ve already got Sandusky, don’t put this shit on us too.