-Sir, reports just in that Lena Dunham and Ryan Murphy have combined forces!
-(gulp) Get me the Pentagon.

These humans are beginning to bore me….

Oh cool, let's drop them into North Korea to sort that whole deal out.

Would accept.

Ehhh he's a bit of a cliched villain at this point. Besides, Cletus Kasady (in case the name didn't already suggest it), is supposed to be a redneck. He could just show up and do his Boyd Crowder routine on autopilot and it'd fit perfectly.

Nooooo! You were supposed to be Carnage in the Venom movie

Bourne was exactly the same as the previous one, which was already covered in this column. Hot Fuzz is parody, mostly for people who don't actually watch action movies.

Bane does it in the opening scene of TDKR

Indeed. It is Bond going back to basics, From Russia with love style, and lazy people just said that a Bond that cuts out the bad CGI and groaning one-liners is now somehow a Bourne movie.

Yes, there's no doubt that 300 was The Action Movie of its year. It had a huge impact and influence, the big line was quoted and memed everywhere, I have no problem with it being in this column. But that year is 2007, not 2006.

Her naked selfies got leaked (or "leaked") on the internet so maybe she just thought, eh fuck it.

300 does not exactly seem like a film festival movie.

But in this case he has literally picked a film from the wrong year. 300 was released in March 2007.

He didn't even get the year right, 300 didn't come out until 2007! Hopefully someone gets a message to him.

It isn't an Action movie though. If Collateral wasn't allowed in, then neither is this.

Fake news! 300 was released on March 9, 2007.

Wow, that's a really convincing animated character in that still photo. Amazing the twisted, terrifying creations they can come up with these days!

Yeah that statement seems very publicist-approved for maximum contrition. But this is at least the second time he's done it, he did the public apology tour when promoting Fury and said he'd worked all his stuff out, etc.

Electric Jewbaloo?

((James Franco appears))