Good? Oh man, I think we need to upgrade this to a stellar year! Congratulations all around for you!

GUYS. i have good stuff happening. i recently moved to a great city full of people i love. i got my dream job, starting on monday. i bought a beautiful new dress. i'm going out celebrating a champagne year with my roommate tonight, and he gets a mad discount at this restaurant group, so we're going baller as fuck. I'M…

happy birthday!! i'd give you a gift, but you got yourself better stuff than i ever could. well fucking done. please accept my best and happiest wishes!

Shit, you're killin' it! Happy birthday and congrats! I bet 38 will be a good one, too.

That is AWESOME. I lost 40lb this year and am walking a bunch and it makes me feel so empowered. I love your attitude. Get it girl.

I'm on almost week 3 of maternity leave and I'm soooooo bored!!! And I'm also a human pacifier to this little girl

Damn, that is a good year!

I have a huge crush on my college professor. I know I shouldn't pursue anything until the end of the semester when I graduate, but he's single and only 3 years my senior. I'm pretty sure he likes me too. ughhhhhhhhhhh so frustrating.

Daaaaaaamn! You must feel so badass. Keep it up.

Honestly, on the subject of 50 Shades, my one wish for that movie would be for theaters to create special screenings designed for those who showed up just to make fun. I really want to go, but I also don't want to feel like a dick laughing during what I'm sure isn't going to be a laughing movie. Also, it would be…

totally. Also she was fully caressing the shaft of the pineapple tree?

Yo Gabba Gabba is watched by people of all ages and various levels of sobriety, so maybe they were on to something.

To be fair, Yo Gabba Gabba is an excellent show.

Yes, you can definitely do better than the Republican! Honestly, I would also strongly advise running the other way from him, and not even letting him slither his way back into your life as a "friend" (even of the no-benefits kind). Did he apologize for abruptly cutting off all contact, or offer any sort of…

That relationship left me feeling quite anxious and not wanting to be touched for a while, even though he didn't really do anything wrong because I didn't object verbally or physically try to stop him.

One of my flaws, I suppose, is that I seem to always want to salvage something when possible, like I can't stand it when I've had an acrimonious split in any type of relationship (romantic or otherwise) and that there is this person out there in the world, thinking badly of me. But I really need to cultivate my IDGAF…

Yeah, sounds like you're not hurting in the "guys who want to fuck you" department, so make sure to give it to the ones who are most worthy of your time and energy. The Republican sounds like he's just trying to get laid. I mean, unless he is a super awesome sex machine who can make you cum at the drop of a hat,…

Ravenously gobbling up his crumbs will not turn them into a full loaf

Totally agree. The first time was hard but I felt like it was ok - that's something that you should be allowed to ask for in a relationship and it should be honored. You don't get to keep doing it.

You know what, he doesn't have a good reason for being bothered. I'm thinking since he couldn't come up with some negative characteristic to tell the councelor about me he just went with saying that he finds it odd i have no female friends. I'm also thinking the councelor told me i need to build relationships so we…