This looks disturbingly like a pro-date-rape campaign.

i think hes best off with a fleshlight...

Or maybe he fucking sucks in bed and she's too nice to tell him.

She's fucking someone else, bro.

I'm a Southerner and my family has lived in the same rural area for over 200 years. If there is a symbol to show the pride of being Southern, the confederate flag isn't one of them. Plain and simple. You want to show pride? Feed people who aren't from the South BBQ, have them listen to bluegrass, blues, or country,…

So, if anyone's around the St.Paul area and looking for a good time, boy do I have a tip for you.

That cocaine really cuts the time it takes to churn the butter. Hands dusted indeed, let it snow.

Williams and Sonoma, fancy kitchen shit for people who don't actually cook. Mostly because they can afford cocaine.

My favorite feature of the Gingerbread Estate is how all of the gingerbread women hold their purses tightly if you add a chocolate cookie to the set

"$500 for a beehive? I dramatically overpaid."

Look at this fuckin guy here

I got the potato gloves from last year's hater's guide. Love them.

I feel my cholesterol getting higher just reading that.

Here is the correct answer. Beat the eggs in a bowl with heavy whipping cream and cook them in butter. As for fillin I suggest avocado, added at the end. If you want to get real fancy, garlic in the pan as the butter melts, add eggs with fresh spinach, topped off with some chevre. That's how it's done son.

May hornets built a hive in your brain.

"A little thing that can turn into anything at anytime."