Those are sentiments you send when someone’s destination wedding was cancelled because of a thunderstorm.

Yeah, and I bet Joshua would have gotten the role of Aunt Becky too if it hadn’t been for Mrs. Loughlin. So rude.

I’ll get in: Beto seems like a good guy, full of attractiveness and personal magnetism. I mean, like a genuinely good guy. But to quote Lerner and Lowe:

When the fuck are you ever going to look at that picture of sushi you ate? You’re only taking that picture to brag on social media. Just eat your food and enjoy the goddamned moment. I don’t understand how people can live through an instagram filter.

You’ve answered your own question. Proof: I did get to watch Mathnet for a year or two.

How could you miss Felicity Huffman’s unforgettable turn as Julia in a few episodes of Frasier?

I know that this story is primarily about the wealthy class and buying their way in, but I also think there’s a dynamic about this being the progression of the mommy wars and the idolization of our children as a reflection of us. Maybe I’m projecting because I’m neck deep in it with the age of my kids (22/ 15). I know…

At what point is ANYONE going to mention that, of the 35 Jewish members of Congress, only 3 are not Democrats?

“Jewish people are leaving the Democratic Party...”

Hopefully the courts have mercy.

If she’d spilled wine on her mother’s favorite fringed leather dress and taken a nerd’s lawn mowing money to pretend to be his girlfriend. You live and learn I guess.

She’s going from Full House to The Big House!

So, since Lori Loughlin is involved, is it fair to say that this scandal is everywhere you look?

The funny thing is, if a black person works their ass off to get into a school, racists will yell about affirmative action. MEANWHILE.........

Name one coal-powered steam airplane that has crashed in the last 100 years.

If she only enjoyed pastrami, dayenu ...

Hillary’s response to Donald’s Tweet was magic:

Not to be pedantic, but it’s “hamberders”.

I would much prefer the parents of 3-13 year olds to march onto a plane wearing a sandwich board that reads “I’m aware of my responsibility to make sure my child does not kick your seat, throw food, or otherwise disturb you. Please let me know if I’m failing”